Mysterious Substance

Tonight I bow my heart to the cry of my inner most being,

my need and desire to be in the arms of Love’s Embrace. 

I begin by making the choice to find this Passage

so I may yield to the turns it will lift my thoughts to. 

The Place that gives me the Breeze of Fresh Morning Air

that Awakens something that was not there

prior to its swift crisp hit sending Signals to all my senses. 

For when I find the call that Love Brings,

I find the importance my own mind held

suddenly loses power to be supreme. 

I become awaken to a New Search that gives lasting Beats

that come to my surrounding with

Waves of His Name Sounding its Beautiful Tune. 

A Vision forms before my eyes

that captures the need within me to look closely,

look with a desire that develops into a countenance

across my face. 

For I am now beginning to find

the Character of my Love is with enormous bounty. 

Spilling out around me comes

the voice of my uncontrolled love

returning to His Glorious Robe of Pureness. 

My eyes become fixed,

fixed upon His Beauty,

only moving to behold His Complete Array of Light

and ever so careful to follow His Movements. 

For He fills all the rooms of my heart

with mysterious Substance from what He is. 

His Answers of Life brings to me

heavens Purposes for my steps to make. 

Searching Him I find

His Sounds are made of unblemished unknown Knowledge

that have been sent for the lifting of my walk. 

I listen with senses that are delicately created

for more than my words can mention. 

Of something more I seek.  

For I want to know loyalty to His love

from my whole given time,

faithful to come and watch,

trusting His Touch will heal all. 

Everything within me embracing the

Tingle of His Presence

as I am filled

with His Emotions that have Wisdom as its Power. 

Oh how wondrous the Moments of Encountered Silence

that is piercing to mark its Truth in my soul. 

I am Shaped into a

hidden unrecognizable image

found only as I mirror His Face. 

As I but sit here, sit with the gift of my love before Him,

I drink of water that is found no other place

and it forms New Actuality. 

What was is gone,

what is – is forming anew. 

I behold Him and change. 

His Love is my love...!

http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/mikelacer

Love Notes

Jesus, it is almost your birthday and because You are so special to me I want to give something that gets Your attention.  Not that you notice me but that You see love that You so deserve.  When I was a child the best thing I knew to do when I liked someone was to give them a love note.  Inside it made me feel like I had just given them a million trillion dollars for it was my love, to them, my love.  Sometimes I was not sure if they loved me back in the same measure but I sure knew I was full of it when I wrote it.  I know how You feel about me for the many love notes I have received from You; I love them.  How special it is to receive a note from someone that loves me. So, right now, for a gift…. I just want to write You a love note.

Dear Jesus, I love You so much and here are a few reasons my love feels such passion to be with You with great desire.  Sometimes in the middle of the night, when my affections are asleep and resting from thought, I hear Your Sweet Voice and Smile knocking at my non-conscience, non-alert state of awakeness.  Heart quickened by the passing of Your Song but mind asleep, I am only nudged slightly just for Your Kiss of Attentiveness over my resting being.   Your Snuggles are warm and always given when my feet become cold.  Quickly You have just the right weight of covering to bring me back into the comfort of a place to lay my head.  I am only taken into a slight desire to raise an interest for Your intent is not to bring me out of my rest but just to assure me Your Eye watches even as I sleep.  I smile with thankfulness and lean back into the sinking pillow of Your Spirit that softens my dreams of You.  And I rest.  I rest with knowing that before You walked this earth You saw I would be.  You befriended me in Your Dreams and with Passion You Sought to give me Life.  Your Heart beats were the timing of a clock that would give precise working to my place of existence.  I fall back asleep with the Guarding of my world from One who Sees before time was - to beyond the end.  I have days that are numbered by Loves Wisdom.  All my days have been designed to allow the Streams of Your Father’s Passion for me to give Him Pleasure.  My dance that giggles His Heart makes His Moment as His Eyes finds me loving You.  He finds me writing a love note to You and shows it to His Creation.  Saved in a Special Place He puts them for the Glory and Remembrance of why He gave His Son, the Blessed Love of His Own Life.  Jesus, I love You and thank You for Loving me is such this way.  I just wanted You to know that tonight. 

Oh God, Be Moved By My Needs

We often fear the consequences of our confession but we rarely think about the consequences of our concealment.

MY PRAYER AS HIS ANGEL WATCHES OVER ME

I have opened my eyes and find need. 

So quick to see the shackles on those near

not realizing my own ankles travel with chains. 

God, I am so moved by the Love Covering my ugliness. 

Oh God, be Moved by my needs

and take Hold of my heart with Compassion and

Cleanse the grim so that my irregular heart beat will be made Strong

with Perfect Beat to the Timing Heaven Gives

over Your Kingdom of Righeousness. 

Sadly,

so often, on goes the turmoil of a soul

seeking vain satisfactions

when the Riches of Glorious Pampering

by Words of Beauty of Spirit Life

is in the reach of each breath;

access to Your Throne simply with a turn

toward the Rock of Your Voice

rather than selfish massages that send false messages of calming the soul.

 

Oh how feeble the attempt to reach heaven with works of

ugly darkness that dresses itself as light. 

I melt with repentance over my own loud obnoxious words

that tear into the atmosphere with damage

and ask the Giver of Life to Form in me

the Name of Your Son, Jesus, upon my lips

by Filling my conscience and unconscious

lungs of thoughts

with only the Air of Your Vocabulary

that Sounds of Light Knowledge from Deep. 

Psalms 34:9 says, Worship God if you want the best;

worship opens doors to all his goodness. 

Verse 7 says,

God’s angel sets up a circle of protection around us while we pray. 

 Father I pray, I worship and I repent for falling so short. 

You are always the same, never changing from the Miraculous. 

I am in need of change. 

Continue to Expose so that I am broken

as Mercy and Grace are Close

to Keep the Doors of Your Purpose Working

in my eyes and heart. 

I become so excited of Your Plans

when Your Correction and Protection have my hand

and I find my eyes focused on its Journey Upward

to the Open Heaven it will bring. 

I trust in Your Protection as I lay open my heart in prayer

for repair by Your Loving Correction. 

My mind will often find fear

and fear brings a run to make the anxiety of its lie

set up war fashioned by my own hands. 

I am learning to set down my own weapons

and wait for the Captain of the Army’s Commands. 

I exalt the One that is the Prize of surrender. 

Jesus, who has already fought my battles and has

Raised the Sun this day for me. 

I give place to something Beautiful in my life and

deny deceitful words lungs to breath.   

I want to only keep praise upon my lips as the

Wisdom that was in the beginning,

before the waters and land of this earth was ever formed and divided,

made Way for us

to carry the Smile of the God You are. 

A vessel Created to Hold Your Love

and bring upon my day the Work of Your Kingdom. 

Thank You for Opening my eyes that I might see. 

Your very Spirit Dwells in me, Your Son, Jesus Christ. 

I study

to show myself approved

by the Greatest of Who You are in me

as I lay down my life for

YOU. 

Continue the Work that makes me more like You.

In Jesus Name I pray with the safety of Your angel

who sets up

a circle of protection

as I pray.

Psalms 34:5 .... Never hide your feelings from him.

(The Message)

(Unknown who said this) 

Holiday Prayer for His Life to Sound

Father of All, and to the One I carry my heart to daily; tomorrow is Thanksgiving and Christmas but a moment away.  Glorious holidays that ring in Beautiful Songs and Melody of hearts turning from our own gratifications to those we love.  I have such an enormous amount of things to give thanks for.  So numerous in fact, I am embarrassed of the list when I think of the struggle within my heart at times; but grateful for Your Eternal Hand so Strong, so in Faith of You I am setting my thoughts to You this morning to redirect unhealthy mourning or things of dread into dancing, senseless crying and whining into laughter, and the worry of unknowns into excitements of Your Plans.  

I am setting my need before You as a call to Blow Your Mighty Breathe into the lungs of my being so that my vision is vertical and not horizontal as I inhale the Fresh Newness You have for us in this season.  I ask that You Lift my head as I open my eyes to see You. 

Take the discouragements or disappointments of my heart, and of all those who happen to come across my path, whether it is through this blog or as I travel my day, into a Knowledge of Merriment and Hope.  Give us Discernment to focus on Appropriate Details that have been Placed in our Path by Your Generosity and for the Enjoyment of our Life in You. 

Help us let fall those things that try to weigh us down and keep us from Singing Openly Your Praise with our voice and our countenance.  For we are excited to be the sons and daughters of the King and have Open Door Invitations into the Royal Company of Your host of Universal Praise that will Sound the Song of Jesus’ birth and celebrate His Life Given for us so we may be a part of His Kingdom.  How Awesome You are, how Generous You are to Yours. 

How Special is Your Love that takes us to see things so differently when Your Guidance we are following.  As we Soak in this Abundant Generosity from the Belly of Your Own Laughter and Joy, we are challenged to let go of all upside down thoughts and step out into this unknown Place of Rest and watch what happens as we hold nothing back; giving all rights to Your Arm of Mercy as we call for this Mighty Blow of Your Life Giving Breath into our spiritual lungs that Swells with Knowledge of Kingdom Promises so we Grow more Alive in our Walk with You. 

When out of our lips cry the ridiculous lie that life seems unfair, we speak the Truth that we are Favored by the King and Taken into His Courts with Praise as His Own.  We are Rich in Blessings that are eternal and Locked in Your Heart.  We have Steps of Fruitfulness yet to discover that give our eyes Vision beyond the sight of our known.

Doors of Prosperity for our soul await us now and forever.  We are pregnant with the seeds of His Righteousness that will burst through all darkness and reveal the Son of Glory.  Jesus' Blood flows in Constant Motion through our life, Giving us an Exaltation for His Work and Power forming our days.  We are resting in Who He is.  We are free to rest not in our own work but in His.  This is our desire… to follow Him all our days and Sing His Holy Name forever…!  Amen.

Lab Reports

I work at a Medical/Dental clinic where I sit as the Administration Assistant.  My job has amazingly broad duties, and I love them all, but much of the time I am taking care of the credentialing process for our providers/physicians, keeping all their different licenses up and networked with required facilities.  We are growing so fast and in process of building our second medical clinic … we presently have two dental clinics but they too are busting out their walls.  Yesterday I wore another favorite hat (or I should say apron-because I literally did have on an apron) … we had our thanksgiving luncheon and I got called “Miss Suzie Homemaker” or “ Betty Crocker” throughout the day for I was in the kitchen preparing/warming both dishes and tables, while de-boning our luscious turkey.  In this picture I am peeling potatoes :0-)

However, today I had told the RN that I would pick up Lab/Hospital reports from the hospital on route to work since the person who normally does this is on vacation; but I sure didn’t realize that when I followed through with this agreement I would receive my own Lab Report.  It isn’t easy reading your own Lab results: because reading it can be a challenge.  But sure enough, it clearly had my name written on its page.  I was traveling down the hospital road when I questioned my heart as it just seemed to not have much pulse, you know, the kind that keeps a smile on your face.  Again a song was sounding on my CD with those words that question Jesus what He is thinking, what is He feeling, they wanted to know.  As I listened I began to take on that same question myself.  My Lord, I am troubled and it is not a place I normally stay very long but this seems to be lingering, why… what are You Doing, what are You Thinking, I really, really want to know. 

I’ve learned that in every situation God ALWAYS meets me, I just have to be persistent and seeking, that just about totals the equation. So again I asked … Lord, what are You Thinking and Feeling… I really want to know. 

That’s when my report came in…!  Oh yeah, it was me all right.  I saw myself in a flash, a visual, with clarity, shocked at all the things in my hands, trying to maintain a balance but obviously it was giving me a shaky stand as I was barely holding up.  Have you ever seen someone with their hands so full and you instantly are moved to ask them if you can help?  Politely they respond… ‘Oh no, I’m fine, I can handle it.’  You watch as they only have a small visual corner to walk their path for the load is more than they can carry yet insisting on doing it alone and will even attempt to open their own doors.  What can you do?  They are clutching to every item as if allowing another to help carry it would be less than their own responsibility to complete their journey.  So you watch; wondering when something in their load is going to come crashing down. 

Then again it happened!  The Second Page of my Lab Report!  You know, where it gives a suggestion or solution on what to do.  I felt the Sweetness of His Eyes of Passion for me.  I watched as He opened His Arms.  “Give me your hand” says the Gentle, Calm Voice … His Whisper as a Soft Heart Nudge.  Without thinking my reply was, “I can’t, my hands are full.”  In that same Whisper that Brought in a Warm Blanket as it Spoke to my chilly heart, He replies, “Exactly.” 

I wept… oh yeah, I wept for first of all that I heard His Love … second that a small piece of Understanding was forming.  And third… even though it was discipline, I know He disciplines those He loves.  I was loved.  So now I am swimming in thoughts.  What do I lay down?  Do I lay them all down?  Do I just not care about anything?  Should I just spill it all and let someone else carry it?  If my hands are so full I can’t take His then it appears to me the easiest solution would be to just drop it all.  I mean doesn’t it say to lay ALL YOUR BURDENS down for He cares for me…!!  But somehow I just don’t think that is what my Report meant.  For He tells me to ‘pick up’ my cross and follow… ‘put on’ the whole amour of God… ‘lift up’ my praise to Him…  be the ‘good Samaritan’ and feed the hungry.  On and on His Words tells me of Job Duties of my position.  Yeah, Job Duties assigned by the Mighty One. 

Where I work, 40 hours a week, one day I am working non-stop with a physician and then the next day I am cutting up potatoes with a cutesy apron on.   Job Duties..!  So I knew I needed a Physician to talk to me about my Lab Report.  What better Physician than His Word… of course… there is no other.  So I begin to ask because that is what He wants… Ask and you shall receive, knock and it shall be opened..!  I asked all morning while I work.  I’m off at noon on Fridays so I am over anxious to get home.  I struggle, I seek, I read, I go to talk with my mother-in-law.  I have to get an ex-ray of my hand so I do that.  I come home… I ask…???

What are You saying God?  I kept praying, I had been trying to follow His Guidance..:0)  well, I do… I try sometimes and to me it appears to lead nowhere so I just keep on keeping on.. :0)  I read the Word, I begged… I can really be a child at heart when it comes to this sort of thing.  I'm a good begger when it comes to wanting the things of God.  But I wanted to know… how do I reach to take His Hands if my hands are full…!??? How???  Then I hear His Voice once again.  Oh how Lovely is the Smile of God.  How Priceless for I can find nothing else that compares.  I hear Him Say with Clarity and Comfort, “In all things give thanks!”  WHAT?  How does that apply?  So I keep reading, keep seeking as now I have His Voice, a Job Duty, something to follow.  And there is was... my search for Him took me to it and it illuminated everything!!!… I found it in I Thessalonians 5:

¹⁶ Rejoice always, ¹⁷ pray without ceasing, ¹⁸ in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.
¹⁹ Do not quench the Spirit. ²⁰ Do not despise prophecies. ²¹ Test all things; hold fast what is good. ²² Abstain from every form of evil.
²³ Now may the God of peace Himself sanctify you completely; and may your whole spirit, soul, and body be preserved blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. ²⁴ He who calls you is faithful, who also will do it.

So I have a new Smile… yeah, a NEW SMILE.  For today my Duties in the Lord is to Give Thanks in everything.  And how do I do that… TEST everything about myself, EVERYTHING that I am holding on to.  Keep what is good and THROW OUT what is a form of evil.  The Great thing about it is the part where ‘He who calls you is faithful, who also will DO IT !”  So I am mindful and have been summoned for court duty.  I will take my load before the Mighty One and one at a time I will allow Him to Judge it.  Is it Good, is it bad… He is my Maker and Judge.  My Job Duty is to take it to Him and trust… for then He will do it.

God, Help Me Love Me...!

Good morning my Savior, I would love to just take a moment to thank You for Your Safe Keeping and Your unmerited Favor towards me. 

Read a little note this morning on a card from an unexpected source that I was ‘missed’ at a recent event.  Funny how that causes that something on the inside to explode with a song of gratitude!  Hard to describe or even understand but it’s like it shoots down all the little armies in your head that your not accepted or your not wanted.  You are a misfit and don’t belong to this part of the country.  Your name has a label attached to it that screams MISFIT. 

How easily we box our self up, secure the lid with layered folds and take ourselves to the storage room where we keep all the maybe need or want someday rather than in the family room where its use is loved and needed most every day.  My Great God, I hate when I do that to myself.  At times this behavior is such a normal response that I rarely catch when I’ve done it; I only wake up boxed in and unable to find my way out.  But today I am throwing open the box, AGAIN, and taking hold of This Love from You, my Savior, with Your Strength that has come from a sister of character.  And as her example of Your Love I want to pass on the Love found  to those I am in contact with.  Loving You with all my heart and others as myself. 

^{Matthew 22:36} Teacher, which ^[e]kind of commandment is great and important (the principal kind) in the Law? [Some commandments are light--which are heavy?]

    ³⁷And He replied to him, You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind (intellect).^(C)

    ³⁸This is the great (most important, principal) and first commandment.

    ³⁹And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as [you do] yourself.^(D)

    ⁴⁰These two commandments ^[f]sum up and upon them depend all the Law and the Prophets.

What a tremendously complicated action You have asked of us!  For so often I do not love myself so how can I love another? 

I listened to a heart crying the other day of one telling me she could not handle the pain given her heart so she produced her own pain by cutting herself as then she was able to deal with its pain.  She could clean it up, bandage the wound, and even watch as the wound began to heal to completion; unlike the pain coming from a source outside her that was overpowering her mind.  She was struggling with another’s opinion of her again with great difficulty.  Are they accurate in their opinion?  How do I pull away from this loud sound of one who screamed its thoughts at me and now no longer alive for me to return my fight.  Loss was knocking her down and fear of tomorrow had her steps ordered.  

I know hardly what to do but cry with her.  Direct her to my Source that I find when I am hurting of opinions of my own or that of another.  I did not know how to tell her that it will not happen, only that when it does there is One that Cares beyond my understanding.  How Often You have come to my side while I tearfully sobbed my worthlessness. 

So God, I am asking…please Help me Love myself today.  Please Give me Your Guidance and Truth so that I may Love others as myself.  Where my feet travel, please let me hear You Sing with me as I Dance the day for You.  I am in need, great need; for I want to love others as myself.  Show them Your Love Works even when I stumble myself.  My voice has tremors and needs tuned to Your Opinions.  My ground is muddy and needs Roots of Grass that Soften and allow bare feet to Walk in the Open Garden of Your Love. 

I rise up now to accept the Glow of Your Love that Carries me beyond my self opinions.  For I am Your Favorite Created by You, the only one of my kind…. What are You Thinking, What are You Saying… I have to know!!!  In Jesus, the Name Given Above, Amen.

How Bad Does It Hurt to go Deeper?

Have you ever looked back at a prayer and thought... I sure didn't realize His Answer would come this Way!  Today I found this prayer that I prayed about a year ago and I sink as I realize even greater the need to continue deeper. But with a year further into my journey, I have even more knowledge of how needy my heart is, for with every Touch and Visit from on High I have to see the difference between my flesh and His Spirit and this sight sometimes is ADULT CONTENT ONLY.  It feels like I've stepped out on Hot Coals as the blisters swell and the mind crashes.  God is my Rescue as I again pray this same prayer but this time with His Knowledge that trials and pursecution, as well as the Manifestation of His Love, is what makes this happen.  For what do you do when His Spirit begins to reveal the flesh so cold...?  Oh so so easy... you surrender to the Love that Breaks the wall and Soak in His Abundance of Correction and Beauty.  So, what do you do when you see the flesh of your brother or sister or when they see the flesh in me that I may be blinded to?  Oh my God...what do you do?  So far to go... so far to go to understand and be Like my God.  How do You Look upon me with such Eyes of Passion while I continue in my sins?  Do You pat me on the back and Kiss the sin.  No, I see You Speaking and Stretching Your Love towards me in Warnings and Pleas while Holding my Hand if I chose the fall.  So Ready to be with me and Help me get back up.  Promising NEVER to leave me nor forsake me. Oh God, Continue to Teach me a better Way, a different Route, a Greater Escape to Find the Complete You.   Oh God, Take me There... For how bad will it hurt to go deeper.  I cannot let that scare me for there is but One Way... Your Will be done... NOT mine.  Again I pray..!!!!

December 14, 2009 – Take Me Higher

Dearest Father I am so humbled today and taking deep thought of my destiny in You.  Basically, I acknowledge that my present state of contentment in You is so minor to Your true place You would have me to be.  I am so sorry.  I have laid in the Arms of Love and found myself falling into contentment and consumption of it all; failing to carry on with the Work that has been assigned.  I am desperate in all of my ways.  I am sinking so often while struggling to climb.  I find an edge and look out over the land and make camp when it would be best to move on higher.  My goals are weak and small.  My arms are weak from laziness and contentment.  I am wondering in a wilderness with too much time on my hands.  Finding my own enjoyments rather than seeking the Kingdom.  I have asked for Your help but with pleasure only in mind.  I have walked in Your Garden and have stopped to play in the field while brisk winds blow outside. I have refused to put on the armor so to fight the Storm of Your Work.  I have seen battle grounds and have become scared as I find only my own strength to fight and know I will be devoured.  I see with eyes of mercy but respond with a heart of coldness.  I cannot lift my head in the crowd of Your weary soldiers.  The trumpet has sounded and I stand behind a rock in fear.  Oh my God, my deliverer… You must strengthen my feet for war.  You must trouble my waters so that I move on in the path of Your Righteousness. I have fixed my eyes on the beauty in this land rather than the Heavenly Purpose I was designed for.  My destiny has been for such a short focus rather than for a long run.  I search for places to rest and not places to bring Your Kingdom to this earth.  With the Power of Your Holy Spirit as my strength, I know ALL land can be taken but I fearfully see giants and I shrink.  You must give me the eyes of Your Power and Might.  I must be taken to the Place that builds Faith and washes out the grim of complacency.   My heart cries for this change but my flesh runs and hide in fear.  Not my will but Yours be done, oh my God.  Take my heart and renew it in me.  Trouble my flesh in Your Love.  Walking in Your Will has become the drink I crave from morning to night.  Basking in the warmth of Your Love is the refreshment that everything within me finds pleasure.  Forgive me for taking my time to move on.  Forgive me for having such a small focus and react as a child with gimme-gimme all the time.  I have only this life to work with and I do not want to waste it.  Time has become so short and the work so large.  Within Your Arms I know I can travel but waiting to step out has been my downfall.  Take away this fear; show me again the Purpose and Plan.  Give me more chances.  Finish the work You started in my mother and father that has been past on to me so that I can give a strong and powerful Work on to my own children.  What has been taught of You cannot be taken.  With Mercy and Goodness following me, I give my heart to Your Call.  I repent for seeing You so small and I purpose to watch for Your Mightiness and Power.  By the teaching of Your Sweet Holy Spirit, I will take hold and run.  Catch me, oh my Lord, when I fall.  Strengthen me each time.  Save me continually and I will fight for Your Kingdom to Come.  Send the Might of Your Angelic Host around me and my family.  Tear down the strongholds that fight for my attention.  Clear my eyes and heart of evil so that I become aware of Your Victories.  Bind me and my husband tight so that ‘one’ together has the strength of Your Mighty Unspeakable Army.  Seal Your Work upon our foreheads as we run and not walk.  I stand at another door with Your Name written solid in blood and I run in with the safety of It’s Freedoms and Walls of protection.  I am Yours.  May Your Kingdom come on earth as it is in Heaven in this world created by You.  I am Yours..!!!