Who Knows How We'll End Up

Lord,

excitedly I am looking this morning! 

Woke wondering where is the

House of the Lord today? 

As I got on the keyboard

and began to sing

this question

I heard myself sing in response,

‘I want to hear

Your Voice,

You want to hear

my heart.’

Knowing this is a Place

where Your Love Flows

and outside distractions seem to be

Directions rather than a hindrance,

it is such a wonderful

Place to be. 

As a child,

I remember waking

to the voice of my

mother

and she knew

 well

what she intended

for my day to consist of. 

Sometimes I got up with the

same heart

and sometimes I did not. 

This morning it feels as though

I am getting up with the

same heart

with just an eager question of

what (?)

is in store. 

How Sweet to read

Your Words

first thing this morning

after

having this conversation with You already. 

1 John 3:1-3 (The Message)

What marvelous love the Father has extended to us! Just look at it—we're called children of God! That's who we really are. But that's also why the world doesn't recognize us or take us seriously, because it has no idea who he is or what he's up to.

But friends, that's exactly who we are: children of God. And that's only the beginning. Who knows how we'll end up! What we know is that when Christ is openly revealed, we'll see him—and in seeing him, become like him. All of us who look forward to his Coming stay ready, with the glistening purity of Jesus' life as a model for our own.

So I will run and play

in Your Love

as John describes us as the

'children of God';

for I take this very seriously. 

I have found the

House of the Lord

many times and it is filled with

Your Treasures

that cause me to be Transformed,

Changed

like a child watching their parent. 

I have seen Jesus there

as I sit under the

Roof of His Love. 

Running with others

to Wonder and Play in the Thoughts

and Teachings of His Power. 

So today…

well, today -

Who knows how we'll end up!

But I am enormously energized

with excitement of

meeting

Jesus Christ

for the Highest Treasure,

for I have

His Life

as an example to explore

and the BEST PART….

Oh yeah, the

Best Part

of today is…

that's only the beginning..! 

Who knows

how we'll end up!

Essence Of Your Name Slips From My Heart

How joyful my heart is this morning Lord.  How giddy I feel as I come into this new day, my birthday as You Call each day, as it starts so fresh, unlike the previous day.  I am rejoicing in Your Love today for the emotions of my soul takes on such variety from circumstances.  Oh my Sweet Lord, I must say that it is wonderful when all seems well and smiles are easy, but yet how amazing when the valley has swallowed me and You Reach low and Lift me to the Softness of Clouds and Kiss away my troubles, as the Song of Your Love Speak over me.  Oh Sweet Holy One, to only know Your Love as foundation for all Your Plans and Portion for me, I delight.  Together as the whole earth declares who You are today, I join with them with my praise for I want the very Essence of Your Name Slip from my heart all day long; intentionally looking for those Moments You Create.  Grateful that my steps are Ordered, I accept the Love that Comes from this Act of Mercy and voluntarily surrender with excitement to what it brings.  May You find me walking in faith as I speak Your Name Jesus, the very Name of Power that Began the Process of my existence, before time itself.  The Powerful Name that was/is/always will be a Character of Righteousness. Before I knew of its Miracle for me, before I knew of this Love that forever I will discover Marvels of, Your Name was Creating a Garden for me to walk and talk with You heart to Heart. Desiring me with such Passion that Whisper how You Want me... the total me!  Now I walk with the Knowledge that Your Holy Spirit Dwells in me; and as I listen and become more acquainted today, I will Gain more of You and less of me as this Pure Raises the Standards of my life.   What a Mystery!  Washing over me with the Secrets of eternal Astonishing Amazements!  There is no other greater place to be then in Your Soul Satisfying Mysteries Created individually for only those Owned by Loves Perfect Sacrifice.  Only to those who say they are no longer their own but have surrendered to the Paradise of this Powerful Love.  Waiting to feel, to know, to experience, to hear, to obtain all its Absolutes.  As this Wonder hits my heart with the explosion of Your Love Weighed of Presence, I carry it with glee that burns for more.  Baptize me in total consumption so that I bear the Name Jesus with its Power to Change and the very Essence of Your Name Slips from my heart all day long. 

Yearning to continue this look within the Heart of God I sing with a song I heard this morning speaking of the Holy Spirit (Fire) within me, the Glory of the Most High God…Oh God I SING...!

Come with Your Fire

Come with Desire

Come with Your Jealousy

Burning me, Burning me..!

Come be the Fire Inside me...!

I Cried. I Wept.

Oh Blessed Awesome God, I am so excited for today I have tasted such

Delicious Love!

It fills not only my mouth with Your Praise but my whole belly with Substance that Satisfies wondrous, deep lasting, cravings.  For in a dry and thirsty state I sat at an instrument I use to accompany me as I sang from the pain of a distraught heart. 

I remember often the story my mom will tell of my youth.  I went through a period of time as a teenager that I refused to cry.  I do not recall this very well but she has mentioned it often throughout my life.  In these years so cold to discipline and hardened to my own understanding of life’s tormenting struggles, I slightly remember vowing to stop crying as life hurt to much, so I did.  It broke her heart as she saw me dry up. 

This morning as my fingers made its way up and down a few simple keys on my keyboard, I began to hear You Say her words, “its okay to cry.”  Over again as the Softness of Your Plea came Rolling in, “It’s okay to cry.”  

I looked up to the Bible opened before me and saw a beautiful picture as I read Psalm 3:4  To the Lord I cry aloud, and he answers me from his holy hill (NIV).  Suddenly I saw King David crying, literally crying with the tears that come from one broken and struggling to accomplish what seems to be so strong within his heart.   

I cried as I confessed I cannot give up my dream.  It pounds me hard night and day.  I cannot lay it down as it appears I must. 

I cried.  I wept. 

I shared my broken heart to Him, to the One that Delivers me from my enemies, even when the worst enemy is my soul.   As tears streamed from my eyes I began to sing in my broken voice as I cried like David cried, “Break my enemies teeth so it no longer makes sense to me.  Cause them to be jumbled words that cannot give utterance to my ears”

Psalm 3:7 Arise, O Lord! Deliver me, O my God! Strike all my enemies on the jaw; break the teeth of the wicked.(NIV) 

I continued to sing my cry against my enemy… ‘my thoughts that take me to misunderstand the God that I serve.  My yearnings that pull me aside and hinder my path that was Designed from His Love.’ 

 I cried.  I wept. 

I felt His Love begin to Pour.  I felt new Strength as I yielded to a cry of such deep pain.  I could feel something Rising inside so I sang from this Strength as David sang… “I will not be afraid of tens of thousands of thoughts that have spoken against me… no, not even tens of thousands of thoughts.  I will Rest. I will lie down and Rest.  For You Lord Deliver me from them all.” 

Psalm 3:5-8  I lie down and sleep; I wake again, because the Lord sustains me.  …. From the Lord comes deliverance….(NIV) 

I am not going to give up.  I will set my eyes upon my Father.  My dream will not move so I give it to Him for I am Satisfied in His Love.  He will take my dream and Mold it to be the Delicious Love my heart craves.  It is in the Greatest of Hands.  For He will Mix and Match the Ingredients to Serve me a Delicacy fit for His Owned.  I look towards His Holy Hill as all its Wonders come rolling down upon my soul so dry and thirsty.  His Appetizers have Glory as it’s the Serving Dish and Filled is this Cup to the Order of my appetites.  I have been Taken to the Courts of Worship and my senses have Turned as His Delicious Love is Set before me.

He speaks as I found my fingers suddenly turning Pages of His Word to Sing back to me. 

Song of Songs 2: 4 All I want is to sit in his shade, to taste and savor his delicious love. He took me home with him for a festive meal, but his eyes feasted on me! (The Message) 

I cried.  I wept. 

His Love is Soaking into all my thoughts, Devouring all pains; and confusion no longer has any worth.  I ponder His Delicious Love as I do not want to waste a single Morsel.

He continues to Speak as again I turn to His Word to Sing back to me. 

Psalm 2:7 Let me tell you what God said next. He said, "You're my son (daughter), And today is your birthday. What do you want? Name it: Nations as a present? continents as a prize? 

I cried. I wept. 

My voice no longer has sound, only my fingers play as my heart Hears His Love.  I hardly know how to respond.  I did not understand so I asked, “How is it my birthday, Lord?” 

My heart tunes in to listen as I hear Him say, “Today is a new day I awoke you to.  Every day is your birthday for I make them Fresh and New each sunrise and you are my daughter from its start. Brand New to you. Now tell me your dream. 

I cried. I wept.

I begin to meditate on such a Word, my mind searches my heart to give Him my honesty and not my self hardened desires….?

Lord, I cry in sobs now,

 I want to be near my children.  I want to be next to them so I can be a part of their life but I cannot tell if it is Your Plan. 

I cannot get out another word. 

I cried. I wept.

As If He Knew that would be all I could say, He Responds.…

You are closer than you know. 

You are so much closer than you realize. 

I cried.  I wept. 

Tell Me, He asks again…Tell Me about your dream.

With Renewed Acceptance I began to sing as I heard His Love and Understanding and no condemnation….I knew there was so much more to my dream than I had imagined so I searched my heart. 

I sang loudly as the Spirit within me Gave Truth…! ”

Lord, I want my children to Know You the Way I Know You. I want them to be Close to Your Heart as I am.  I want them to have Your Life within them." 

I cried.  I wept.  

His Gentle Understanding begins to Fill my heart, My Daughter, He Calls me, I have seen your dream and I have Known the Meaning as you have ran to its call.  For your desire to be near Your children is Me wanting to be near your children.  Me wanting to live in their lives.  Me wanting to be at every event.  Me wanting to Love them with Passion I cannot contain.  You are walking out my heart and I will Fulfill this Love for you.  Give me your hand and we will be a Song of Love. 

I cried. I wept. 

He Holds my dream as His Own.

Love Speaks Its Wisdom

Where is my fight, Lord?  What happened to the spunk that kept me smiling and giggling as the world kept pushing me along?  Am I wishing to return to a wilderness?  Am I sitting on one side of a river in the hopes to live on the other?  Why can’t I be stronger?  Where is the key to unlock a tag-a-long nipping at my heels all the time?  

And then Your Love Speaks its Wisdom…

James 1:4 (Amplified Bible)

So don’t try to get out of anything prematurely. Let it do its work so you become mature and well-developed. Not deficient in any way.

Lord, I must like immaturity as it allows for so much foolishness. Forgive me as I awake to the Ways of Truth and ponder what it must be like to not have deficiency.  For I look at maturity in another and find such desire but in no way do I want the Road they traveled, yet I hunger after what I see. 

And then Your Love Speaks its Wisdom as His Word Again Stands Out…

Luke 6:21 (Amplified Bible)
Blessed (happy--with life-joy and satisfaction in God's favor and salvation, apart from your outward condition--and to be envied) are you who hunger and seek with eager desire now, for you shall be filled and completely satisfied! Blessed (happy--with life-joy and satisfaction in God's favor and salvation, apart from your outward condition--and to be envied) are you who weep and sob now, for you shall laugh!

Take a hold of my selfishness and cause me to be aware of the multitude of Your Love’s Armies around me. 

And then Your Love Speaks its Wisdom as a Song comes on the internet…

You are not alone…You are not alone!  I will send a Helper, He says, You are not alone.  You are not alone. You are not alone, I will send a Helper to you, says the Lord.  He will Abide in You, bringing to remembrance everything I’ve spoken to Your heart.  I will not leave you as an orphan.  I will not leave you alone. I will give you a helper for you cannot do it alone. You are not abandoned but I have given You my Spirit. Lean not on your own understanding; lean on me, I will give you strength. You are not alone; I will send a Spirit of Comfort. Where ever you go He will be with you.  Where ever you go he will be near you always.  Wherever you go He will be in your heart abiding with you.  

In this Sound of Song’s Love I bathe for I forget so easily Your Wrapping around my heart that Sets Your Spirit to my life.  I take in each Note of Sweetness as if it were the Bouquet of Fresh cut Roses to bring instant pleasure only; for each Moment speaks New Songs over this Truth of never being alone.  You stop my striving to find that outside, and Open my eyes to Hear Your Sound of Truth Inside.  Your Spirit of Truth Closer than a mother or father.   I come now as Your Love Calls for I am not alone.  You have Sent the Spirit of Comfort.  I am not alone.

Acts 2:39 (Amplified Bible)
For the promise [of the Holy Spirit] is to and for you and your children, and to and for all that are far away, [even] to and for as many as the Lord our God invites and bids to come to Himself.

My love speaks back to He who Came

 I love You so much!  Thank You for Showing me again Your Love…!  You are Right; I cannot do it alone.

Intoxicating Wine That Steals Away Our Sins

Father, Almighty that Establishes me and those who have been Placed in a Connection to me with a deep family unit, carefully Thought out by Your Opinion and Inspiration so that Your Name will Deliberately have a Place for Reflection of Your Identity.  This Fact has such Mysterious Extremes that are difficult to absorb but it is not about an ego or my qualities, but in reference to Your Compassion and Kindness Poured Lavishly into my life so that I Walk Your Life as the Excitement and Direction it is.  I know not but to accept this overwhelming Love that seems to awake me each day.  The more I find this Affection, the more I want to come to its Fountain of Constance as all sorrow gives way to the Fondness of Your Eyes so Kind.  In such Wisdom of this Cup Given, I am shattered in its Splendid Life of Abundance, so I cry out for my children to also be acquainted with this Intoxicating Wine that Steals away my sins as Your Love Flows through our veins.   Father, Almighty, with Corrective Moves, Lift up Your Foundation to be the Teaching of Communication for a Right mind set for my children.  Taking them from their own understanding to Your Understanding that makes a day carry Value.  Giving them the Wisdom that surpasses the structures of their own strength so that leaning upon You has Room to Grow.   As Your Spirit Floods their heart with a Gush of Might, Show Your Vision as the Way, the Truth, the Life of all Roads to travel.  You have Designed us all so individually that Your Passionate Dazzling Love brings us to such a desire to serve.  Serving becomes the Weakness that brings us to Triumph.  The world seems upside down in its rules to success, while Your Promises become the Unwavering, Permanent Guide to find Riches beyond imagination.  I am so thankful for the Guidance that Jesus was Sent to Show us.  He was with You and left that Place to Give me eyes and a heart to Know what He Knew with such Magnificence.  Walking out a Life so that when we see Him, we have seen the Father.  Jesus You are so Wonderful.   I owe a debt I can never pay and yet the Spirit of God Teaches me I don’t have to pay, You did.  Father Continue to Open my eyes to have more Clarity of this Pure Way and continue to Renew the mind of my children and grand children.  As we all call upon the Name of Jesus as the Rock we stand upon, keep my family Solid in Your Ways and keep us at Your Table so that we drink with a heart sold out to Your Intoxicating Wine that Steals away our sins as YOUR LOVE Flows through our veins.

Weakness For Me

God… Chosen?  I am chosen? 

That really messes with my mind, my God.  Every time I think about it I am so delighted in the Midst of this Truth but it feels so contrary to how my mind works.  For this morning I woke and thought it was 'I' that chose to either talk to You or allow my thoughts to wonder about in other conversations that float in the spaces of my time. 

Did I chose or did You Chose me this morning? 

I recall my song this morning as my day was beginning; I asked for the Spirit of Wisdom to carry me through the events I would face today.  Do You Chose to Give me this Wisdom or is it because I asked?  Oh God, I am altogether broken in the Company of Your Heart’s Love for me and I just want my heart to fall deeper and deeper in knowledge of the Love You are. 

My seeking has become such deep desires for You and what it looks like to hold You inside. 

It has to be You that is planting these questions, these moments that Rise in my soul to bring the Thirst of such Amazing Dwelling.  As each Piece of Your Love Causes me to be in Your Situations, I want my residence to read this Address.  As You Arrange my Steps You surely must be Placing the Rank of this Degree of Hunger for Your Matchless Absolutes.  Yet the confusion for me is that the Unfathomable, Bottomless, Hidden, Mysteriously Silent yet Thunderous, Profound Truth of Your Love, Reveals something so Zealous and what appears Your Ultimate Weakness for me. 

Weakness for me?  

My search for why I might be chosen only exposes or uncovers more questions about Your Love of Irresistible Pleasure over me, not my own labor to exert some sort of performance or come off as my own handiwork.  But in quest of reality I ponder the Masterpiece You are Creating, not of my creation or boost; but what Your Love, not mine, is all about.  Your Work, Your Love, Your Show-n-Tell Moments of Your Work in Progress. 

Giving me microscopic Portions of Your Love’s Supremacy and watching the Energy of such Weight Construct Your Image.   

God, what an Incredible Marvel it is to just let You Love me.   This Weakness for me..! To allow my doubts and fears be Seized by Your Zeal to Show what Your Blameless Extremes can Accomplish in something broken because Your Love needs Places to Inhabit.  You have Chosen me, and not because I am a vessel of fine art, but because my cracks can Show Your Sweetness that Flavors the cravings of my soul; which then Portrays the Deepest Places where such Beautiful Springs Refresh a weary mind. 

I am Chosen by the Eye of Your Grand Search for lost and broken street dwellers, homeless on earth.   

I am Given Your Royal Feast because I am now ravenous and running in hunger to sallow the Breakfast, Lunch and Dinner You Serve as You have Opened the Door to the Never Ending Banquet set for the broken and homeless.  Your Weakness for me has Devoured my heart and I can not leave, I can only ask for more and to live here forever.

   I was Chosen by Your Love’s Need and I will play in Your Garden with Jesus who Showed me Your Name for eternity. 

Miracles Continue

Father, sort of dreary outside.  Funny how that can sometimes make me feel less than perky myself.  There is nothing more that I want than to have Your Son Shine within me and yet I often stumble down the Road.  I think about this weekend of remembrance of Your Sweet Son’s Great Work, traveling to the Cross with me in mind.  Before the walk, how difficult it must have been for Jesus to watch one by one as all His friends and followers fell away from supporting and standing beside Him until He was alone, just You and Him. Many made commitments with determination to go anywhere He went but finding it was much more than they expected to remain faithful to be the believer they intended.  I hate that when that happens to me.  I feel so defeated and wonder why I am not stronger.  I want to pretend it isn’t me or my fault as I fidget around with guilt and shame the enemy wants me to hold on to.  I’m always grateful that You allow me to see my failures so that I can search and find Answers to my weaknesses but I know I cannot stand under them long.  Oh God, knowing I need the Teaching of Your Spirit left to Dwell in His Owned when Jesus returned to His Throne, I raise my prayer this morning.  What a Fearful and Wonderful Passage Jesus made.  Ascending to heaven but replacing His body with the unseen, hidden, out of natural sight, Power of God on earth, Your Spirit, Your Personality He Taught so well.  Now existing and breathing within those who accept the Sacrifice Jesus was on that Cross of pain.  What Words of Amazing Life so concealed in this Burial and Resurrection.  Mysterious, Mystifying this Love that Parts the waters that trap me in a corner!   I simply raise my praise and the mighty unpassable sea before me Parts so I walk on Your Dry Land as Your Miracles continue.

This morning I lean into the Results of that Walk to the Cross, and worship; for what You have done may be Mystifying but I walk in the knowledge of its Grace and my heart finds incredible Safety as the harmful attitudes of my mind cause the stumbling confusion while Your Miracles continue.  Weeping repentance for my weaknesses but what mind-blowing Joyful Celebration for Your Love’s Sacrifice!  A heart that sees the Blood that was Offered as the Compensation for my weakness of not being faithful.  How remorseful I am but how elated, ecstatic I find myself as Your Victory over these disappointments, Cover me.  I am alive in Your Love as the Breakdown of my flesh makes adjustments to the Work of this Miracle Made for me.   The Exact of what I now breathe and move in, Your Miracle made for me.  The Miracle of today, the Miracles of tomorrow… and the Miraculous Miracle of the Cross for me in the yesterdays.  Father, You are so Holy and I bow in thankfulness this morning for You are my Strength to continue as ugliness falls and Your Plans are accomplished today.  I have no payment except my heart so broken and confused, but I gladly give it to You.  Jesus said I would have Life Eternal if I went His Way.  Continue, Jesus, to Show me the Way as His Miracles continue…!