Gasping For Love

Found in the Sounds of Morning is the Rain of His Glory Trickling down the very yearnings of my heart for I am

gasping for Love. 

My thoughts wonder about, scattering to frantically find His Song to Meet my challenge for Wonderous Intimacy Favored with the Fruit of His Spirit. 

Love spills forth in search as my heart runs to all our

Favorite Places

to dare see if it should be nearby.  

I fumble with my own pursuit

for I know not how to request this visit without the concentrating of my fainting heart.   

I feel fragile; as if without This Love I die. 

I can not seem to un-focus upon my heart beats of irregularity.  Sharp is the pain that bites my soul as the wind of disappointment tries to speak its worry.   Hopelessness is waiting around the corner to catch me if I go its direction.  Despair whispers its haunting signals as it lingers to observe a possible fall. 

I am powerless to lift my eyes while

gasping for Love,

so I close them

to concentrate upon

His Face I Adore.  

There He is, my Love, my Wonder. 

There He is in a dark place. 

There in the trembling of my soul’s weakness, He Instantaneously Unites with my Reflection, and Voices His Love Promise from Ultimate Purest to be Absolute Always, never to leave me,

EVER! 

In a twinkling of an eye,

gasping for Love,

I found my Savior’s Enormous Force Smash my enemies’ lies and Rapture my heart to His as the Splitting of time was Instant. 

His Interruption of Devine Love Raining in His Glory, I was Caught up by His Radiance in a dark place.  His Illuminating Abundant Elegance was Mighty in Supply as my eyes closed to faint in the misery of my own chase;

Love Surprises me with His Unbroken Promise,

Firm Reminder I am Safe,

Sturdy;

for He is Complete Dependability.   

So I Dance with Love’s Romance

and find Continuous my morning’s Rain.  For I was

gasping for Love

and the Rescue of Love’s Promise Caught me.

Hebrews 13: …5,6…

…for He [God] Himself has said, I will not in any way fail you nor give you up nor leave you without support. [I will] not, [I will] not, [I will] not in any degree leave you helpless nor forsake nor let [you] down (relax My hold on you)! [Assuredly not!]

So we take comfort and are encouraged and confidently and boldly say, The Lord is my Helper; I will not be seized with alarm [I will not fear or dread or be terrified]...

Love Hunts For My Heart

Father, my heart has burst with Your Love. I struggle in my own desires to worship You. I long so deeply to see Your Face in the Secret Place where time has no meaning, we just are.  I want to speak and hear.  I struggle and the Wonders of Your OKAY comes…

Matthew 4:10 Jesus' refusal was curt: "Beat it, Satan!" He backed his rebuke with a third quotation from Deuteronomy: "Worship the Lord your God, and only him. Serve him with absolute single-heartedness."

So I step into a Space where You Fill me with the Surroundings of Your Trust; jumping out into unknown to the Solid of a Rock beneath my feet.   My eyes strike out to find and my ears reach to hear as I embrace a Longing that Entices me to Search, walk around, see the Sights of Amazements.  As Your Wing Beckons to Equip me with a Foundation to Fly for the escape of my soul, I allow my heart to take hold and declare to all else, ‘Rejoice, oh my soul… for the Gift of His Wing has Come.’  The Air made of His Grandeur Bids me to Admire the Magnificence of His Splendor as I move about in the Weight of His Love Lifting me to His Brilliance.   I catch a glimpse where I experience Sensation as I observe Strong Hunger Developing within and I become slain to a New Appetite.  Heavenly Love Forms and I stroke its Embrace and cuddle in its Atmosphere.  Love that Wants me; oh He Wants me with Great Intensity.  Wants me and I hear as

Love Hunts for my heart

for Love’s Sound is Piercing.  He Calls my name by the Desires He Started within me, Pressed Deep within my heart that inquires of such Ultimate Persuades from Love’s Passion.  I sing with enthusiasm for Love’s Life-Flow cause pictures of ordinary to become adoration of single heartedness toward the One I love.  My center of attention escapes my heart as I proclaim my weakness for His Irresistible Kiss upon my eyes for Him.  I have lost grip of worldly senses and insist of only feasting upon the Drink of Love’s Formations.  Designed by the Handiwork of its Nature, Purposed to Steal away any other craving and Establish It Self as Foundation for all remaining life.  I surrender to the Total of Love’s Purpose for me.  I surrender to the Wasting of my life to this Teaching as I ride upon the Wing that Beckons to Equip me as

Love Hunts for my heart. 

I lay to rest all resistance and allow His Love come Live in my heart as my only Savior and vow to accept His Request to Love me more.  I will take Love’s Nature as my own for it is all I want. 

Who Knows How We'll End Up

Lord,

excitedly I am looking this morning! 

Woke wondering where is the

House of the Lord today? 

As I got on the keyboard

and began to sing

this question

I heard myself sing in response,

‘I want to hear

Your Voice,

You want to hear

my heart.’

Knowing this is a Place

where Your Love Flows

and outside distractions seem to be

Directions rather than a hindrance,

it is such a wonderful

Place to be. 

As a child,

I remember waking

to the voice of my

mother

and she knew

 well

what she intended

for my day to consist of. 

Sometimes I got up with the

same heart

and sometimes I did not. 

This morning it feels as though

I am getting up with the

same heart

with just an eager question of

what (?)

is in store. 

How Sweet to read

Your Words

first thing this morning

after

having this conversation with You already. 

1 John 3:1-3 (The Message)

What marvelous love the Father has extended to us! Just look at it—we're called children of God! That's who we really are. But that's also why the world doesn't recognize us or take us seriously, because it has no idea who he is or what he's up to.

But friends, that's exactly who we are: children of God. And that's only the beginning. Who knows how we'll end up! What we know is that when Christ is openly revealed, we'll see him—and in seeing him, become like him. All of us who look forward to his Coming stay ready, with the glistening purity of Jesus' life as a model for our own.

So I will run and play

in Your Love

as John describes us as the

'children of God';

for I take this very seriously. 

I have found the

House of the Lord

many times and it is filled with

Your Treasures

that cause me to be Transformed,

Changed

like a child watching their parent. 

I have seen Jesus there

as I sit under the

Roof of His Love. 

Running with others

to Wonder and Play in the Thoughts

and Teachings of His Power. 

So today…

well, today -

Who knows how we'll end up!

But I am enormously energized

with excitement of

meeting

Jesus Christ

for the Highest Treasure,

for I have

His Life

as an example to explore

and the BEST PART….

Oh yeah, the

Best Part

of today is…

that's only the beginning..! 

Who knows

how we'll end up!

Essence Of Your Name Slips From My Heart

How joyful my heart is this morning Lord.  How giddy I feel as I come into this new day, my birthday as You Call each day, as it starts so fresh, unlike the previous day.  I am rejoicing in Your Love today for the emotions of my soul takes on such variety from circumstances.  Oh my Sweet Lord, I must say that it is wonderful when all seems well and smiles are easy, but yet how amazing when the valley has swallowed me and You Reach low and Lift me to the Softness of Clouds and Kiss away my troubles, as the Song of Your Love Speak over me.  Oh Sweet Holy One, to only know Your Love as foundation for all Your Plans and Portion for me, I delight.  Together as the whole earth declares who You are today, I join with them with my praise for I want the very Essence of Your Name Slip from my heart all day long; intentionally looking for those Moments You Create.  Grateful that my steps are Ordered, I accept the Love that Comes from this Act of Mercy and voluntarily surrender with excitement to what it brings.  May You find me walking in faith as I speak Your Name Jesus, the very Name of Power that Began the Process of my existence, before time itself.  The Powerful Name that was/is/always will be a Character of Righteousness. Before I knew of its Miracle for me, before I knew of this Love that forever I will discover Marvels of, Your Name was Creating a Garden for me to walk and talk with You heart to Heart. Desiring me with such Passion that Whisper how You Want me... the total me!  Now I walk with the Knowledge that Your Holy Spirit Dwells in me; and as I listen and become more acquainted today, I will Gain more of You and less of me as this Pure Raises the Standards of my life.   What a Mystery!  Washing over me with the Secrets of eternal Astonishing Amazements!  There is no other greater place to be then in Your Soul Satisfying Mysteries Created individually for only those Owned by Loves Perfect Sacrifice.  Only to those who say they are no longer their own but have surrendered to the Paradise of this Powerful Love.  Waiting to feel, to know, to experience, to hear, to obtain all its Absolutes.  As this Wonder hits my heart with the explosion of Your Love Weighed of Presence, I carry it with glee that burns for more.  Baptize me in total consumption so that I bear the Name Jesus with its Power to Change and the very Essence of Your Name Slips from my heart all day long. 

Yearning to continue this look within the Heart of God I sing with a song I heard this morning speaking of the Holy Spirit (Fire) within me, the Glory of the Most High God…Oh God I SING...!

Come with Your Fire

Come with Desire

Come with Your Jealousy

Burning me, Burning me..!

Come be the Fire Inside me...!

I Cried. I Wept.

Oh Blessed Awesome God, I am so excited for today I have tasted such

Delicious Love!

It fills not only my mouth with Your Praise but my whole belly with Substance that Satisfies wondrous, deep lasting, cravings.  For in a dry and thirsty state I sat at an instrument I use to accompany me as I sang from the pain of a distraught heart. 

I remember often the story my mom will tell of my youth.  I went through a period of time as a teenager that I refused to cry.  I do not recall this very well but she has mentioned it often throughout my life.  In these years so cold to discipline and hardened to my own understanding of life’s tormenting struggles, I slightly remember vowing to stop crying as life hurt to much, so I did.  It broke her heart as she saw me dry up. 

This morning as my fingers made its way up and down a few simple keys on my keyboard, I began to hear You Say her words, “its okay to cry.”  Over again as the Softness of Your Plea came Rolling in, “It’s okay to cry.”  

I looked up to the Bible opened before me and saw a beautiful picture as I read Psalm 3:4  To the Lord I cry aloud, and he answers me from his holy hill (NIV).  Suddenly I saw King David crying, literally crying with the tears that come from one broken and struggling to accomplish what seems to be so strong within his heart.   

I cried as I confessed I cannot give up my dream.  It pounds me hard night and day.  I cannot lay it down as it appears I must. 

I cried.  I wept. 

I shared my broken heart to Him, to the One that Delivers me from my enemies, even when the worst enemy is my soul.   As tears streamed from my eyes I began to sing in my broken voice as I cried like David cried, “Break my enemies teeth so it no longer makes sense to me.  Cause them to be jumbled words that cannot give utterance to my ears”

Psalm 3:7 Arise, O Lord! Deliver me, O my God! Strike all my enemies on the jaw; break the teeth of the wicked.(NIV) 

I continued to sing my cry against my enemy… ‘my thoughts that take me to misunderstand the God that I serve.  My yearnings that pull me aside and hinder my path that was Designed from His Love.’ 

 I cried.  I wept. 

I felt His Love begin to Pour.  I felt new Strength as I yielded to a cry of such deep pain.  I could feel something Rising inside so I sang from this Strength as David sang… “I will not be afraid of tens of thousands of thoughts that have spoken against me… no, not even tens of thousands of thoughts.  I will Rest. I will lie down and Rest.  For You Lord Deliver me from them all.” 

Psalm 3:5-8  I lie down and sleep; I wake again, because the Lord sustains me.  …. From the Lord comes deliverance….(NIV) 

I am not going to give up.  I will set my eyes upon my Father.  My dream will not move so I give it to Him for I am Satisfied in His Love.  He will take my dream and Mold it to be the Delicious Love my heart craves.  It is in the Greatest of Hands.  For He will Mix and Match the Ingredients to Serve me a Delicacy fit for His Owned.  I look towards His Holy Hill as all its Wonders come rolling down upon my soul so dry and thirsty.  His Appetizers have Glory as it’s the Serving Dish and Filled is this Cup to the Order of my appetites.  I have been Taken to the Courts of Worship and my senses have Turned as His Delicious Love is Set before me.

He speaks as I found my fingers suddenly turning Pages of His Word to Sing back to me. 

Song of Songs 2: 4 All I want is to sit in his shade, to taste and savor his delicious love. He took me home with him for a festive meal, but his eyes feasted on me! (The Message) 

I cried.  I wept. 

His Love is Soaking into all my thoughts, Devouring all pains; and confusion no longer has any worth.  I ponder His Delicious Love as I do not want to waste a single Morsel.

He continues to Speak as again I turn to His Word to Sing back to me. 

Psalm 2:7 Let me tell you what God said next. He said, "You're my son (daughter), And today is your birthday. What do you want? Name it: Nations as a present? continents as a prize? 

I cried. I wept. 

My voice no longer has sound, only my fingers play as my heart Hears His Love.  I hardly know how to respond.  I did not understand so I asked, “How is it my birthday, Lord?” 

My heart tunes in to listen as I hear Him say, “Today is a new day I awoke you to.  Every day is your birthday for I make them Fresh and New each sunrise and you are my daughter from its start. Brand New to you. Now tell me your dream. 

I cried. I wept.

I begin to meditate on such a Word, my mind searches my heart to give Him my honesty and not my self hardened desires….?

Lord, I cry in sobs now,

 I want to be near my children.  I want to be next to them so I can be a part of their life but I cannot tell if it is Your Plan. 

I cannot get out another word. 

I cried. I wept.

As If He Knew that would be all I could say, He Responds.…

You are closer than you know. 

You are so much closer than you realize. 

I cried.  I wept. 

Tell Me, He asks again…Tell Me about your dream.

With Renewed Acceptance I began to sing as I heard His Love and Understanding and no condemnation….I knew there was so much more to my dream than I had imagined so I searched my heart. 

I sang loudly as the Spirit within me Gave Truth…! ”

Lord, I want my children to Know You the Way I Know You. I want them to be Close to Your Heart as I am.  I want them to have Your Life within them." 

I cried.  I wept.  

His Gentle Understanding begins to Fill my heart, My Daughter, He Calls me, I have seen your dream and I have Known the Meaning as you have ran to its call.  For your desire to be near Your children is Me wanting to be near your children.  Me wanting to live in their lives.  Me wanting to be at every event.  Me wanting to Love them with Passion I cannot contain.  You are walking out my heart and I will Fulfill this Love for you.  Give me your hand and we will be a Song of Love. 

I cried. I wept. 

He Holds my dream as His Own.

Love Speaks Its Wisdom

Where is my fight, Lord?  What happened to the spunk that kept me smiling and giggling as the world kept pushing me along?  Am I wishing to return to a wilderness?  Am I sitting on one side of a river in the hopes to live on the other?  Why can’t I be stronger?  Where is the key to unlock a tag-a-long nipping at my heels all the time?  

And then Your Love Speaks its Wisdom…

James 1:4 (Amplified Bible)

So don’t try to get out of anything prematurely. Let it do its work so you become mature and well-developed. Not deficient in any way.

Lord, I must like immaturity as it allows for so much foolishness. Forgive me as I awake to the Ways of Truth and ponder what it must be like to not have deficiency.  For I look at maturity in another and find such desire but in no way do I want the Road they traveled, yet I hunger after what I see. 

And then Your Love Speaks its Wisdom as His Word Again Stands Out…

Luke 6:21 (Amplified Bible)
Blessed (happy--with life-joy and satisfaction in God's favor and salvation, apart from your outward condition--and to be envied) are you who hunger and seek with eager desire now, for you shall be filled and completely satisfied! Blessed (happy--with life-joy and satisfaction in God's favor and salvation, apart from your outward condition--and to be envied) are you who weep and sob now, for you shall laugh!

Take a hold of my selfishness and cause me to be aware of the multitude of Your Love’s Armies around me. 

And then Your Love Speaks its Wisdom as a Song comes on the internet…

You are not alone…You are not alone!  I will send a Helper, He says, You are not alone.  You are not alone. You are not alone, I will send a Helper to you, says the Lord.  He will Abide in You, bringing to remembrance everything I’ve spoken to Your heart.  I will not leave you as an orphan.  I will not leave you alone. I will give you a helper for you cannot do it alone. You are not abandoned but I have given You my Spirit. Lean not on your own understanding; lean on me, I will give you strength. You are not alone; I will send a Spirit of Comfort. Where ever you go He will be with you.  Where ever you go he will be near you always.  Wherever you go He will be in your heart abiding with you.  

In this Sound of Song’s Love I bathe for I forget so easily Your Wrapping around my heart that Sets Your Spirit to my life.  I take in each Note of Sweetness as if it were the Bouquet of Fresh cut Roses to bring instant pleasure only; for each Moment speaks New Songs over this Truth of never being alone.  You stop my striving to find that outside, and Open my eyes to Hear Your Sound of Truth Inside.  Your Spirit of Truth Closer than a mother or father.   I come now as Your Love Calls for I am not alone.  You have Sent the Spirit of Comfort.  I am not alone.

Acts 2:39 (Amplified Bible)
For the promise [of the Holy Spirit] is to and for you and your children, and to and for all that are far away, [even] to and for as many as the Lord our God invites and bids to come to Himself.

My love speaks back to He who Came

 I love You so much!  Thank You for Showing me again Your Love…!  You are Right; I cannot do it alone.

Intoxicating Wine That Steals Away Our Sins

Father, Almighty that Establishes me and those who have been Placed in a Connection to me with a deep family unit, carefully Thought out by Your Opinion and Inspiration so that Your Name will Deliberately have a Place for Reflection of Your Identity.  This Fact has such Mysterious Extremes that are difficult to absorb but it is not about an ego or my qualities, but in reference to Your Compassion and Kindness Poured Lavishly into my life so that I Walk Your Life as the Excitement and Direction it is.  I know not but to accept this overwhelming Love that seems to awake me each day.  The more I find this Affection, the more I want to come to its Fountain of Constance as all sorrow gives way to the Fondness of Your Eyes so Kind.  In such Wisdom of this Cup Given, I am shattered in its Splendid Life of Abundance, so I cry out for my children to also be acquainted with this Intoxicating Wine that Steals away my sins as Your Love Flows through our veins.   Father, Almighty, with Corrective Moves, Lift up Your Foundation to be the Teaching of Communication for a Right mind set for my children.  Taking them from their own understanding to Your Understanding that makes a day carry Value.  Giving them the Wisdom that surpasses the structures of their own strength so that leaning upon You has Room to Grow.   As Your Spirit Floods their heart with a Gush of Might, Show Your Vision as the Way, the Truth, the Life of all Roads to travel.  You have Designed us all so individually that Your Passionate Dazzling Love brings us to such a desire to serve.  Serving becomes the Weakness that brings us to Triumph.  The world seems upside down in its rules to success, while Your Promises become the Unwavering, Permanent Guide to find Riches beyond imagination.  I am so thankful for the Guidance that Jesus was Sent to Show us.  He was with You and left that Place to Give me eyes and a heart to Know what He Knew with such Magnificence.  Walking out a Life so that when we see Him, we have seen the Father.  Jesus You are so Wonderful.   I owe a debt I can never pay and yet the Spirit of God Teaches me I don’t have to pay, You did.  Father Continue to Open my eyes to have more Clarity of this Pure Way and continue to Renew the mind of my children and grand children.  As we all call upon the Name of Jesus as the Rock we stand upon, keep my family Solid in Your Ways and keep us at Your Table so that we drink with a heart sold out to Your Intoxicating Wine that Steals away our sins as YOUR LOVE Flows through our veins.