Spirit With Light That Blinds My Day

Like a wave, 

here comes Spirit 

with light that blinds my day 

to a place that has rich 

as its walls 

and honey as its taste.  

For the cares of life fall to my side; 

and I seem to never find them again.  

For where Your heart is fixed, 

like anointed oil - 

these times drip heaven’s floor.  

Riding the waves of glory 

has the anticipation 

of the best ride each time.  

Knowing that deeper into the ocean of pardon 

has gotten me to its hold 

and I never want to come to shore.  

To grab this connection that I am Yours, 

seems to be easier and easier to hear.  

But

 to hear You are mine, 

I need more and more of this current 

to take me out further and further 

to be sold this entrance of Holy.  

Spirit calls 

and I find jumping in 

is like walking in the rain of summer, 

coming from so far up 

that the eye cannot understand how it falls 

with such softness 

to give life in potions of tiny drops.  

Oh how the beat of such waves 

cries together forever, 

together forever, together forever.  

My soul runs like it has no knowledge 

of leaving anything behind… 

only eyes for ahead.  

Can you hear, 

oh can you hear my love 

taking me to the picnic of the most fantastic spread.  

In the sky, not the land, 

I soar.  

Holding peace around me 

as it shows me feast after feast to choose from.  

And there my soul plays 

for this moment, 

there is nothing of matter, 

only love speaking.   

Heart That Has The Power To Explode The Heavens

Oh with watchful heart I cry, oh Lord, for Your love has burst through and caused floods to overcome the mountains that were so dry.  Oh the glory of such majestic swirling within my soul to be a substance that moves me from where I am to a realm I can only know by its life that changes me.  

In this temple where the pleasure of a love develop and make their extravagant deeds come to surface without a sound from the might of the mouth.  The heart has the power to explode the heavens with such abundant sounds, the clouds move and the ladder of my heart reaches to the wonders of Holy.  

Oh how, oh where does this take the voice I hear and how does it stay?  How can I match any other moment to this moment?  Where touch upon touch is built so the eyes of my thoughts make a pounding that breaks the gaze of heaven and I see a new thing.  

Moves make a different purpose than before.  Sounds highlight and I gather them to create my love and establish my song.  What was of little or no importance now becomes the next view, the next explanation of my life surrendered to a Way that is perfect.  

Stuck on motion that appears to say one thing but its radiance forms its beginning and travels eternal.  And then it stops.  I breathe and focus changes, but my heart has enlarged and changed to many elements of One’s love.  

Jesus Blushes With Me Over Poppa's Love

Hearing a voice sound in the afar off … hearing a thought from a distance…catching my attention and all things drop as I run to its sweetness. More beautiful than I can take completely in, for beauty I've seen, but each glimpse appears to me like new.  And none like its sound piercing straight to the refreshing of a mind. 

There it is, caught up in a wind and floating as the breeze carry’s it place to place.  Landing is the furthest from its dream for the weightlessness works wonders to the resting of body and spirit.  I join its drift as I lift my soul to fly with the sights and enthusiasm of love’s call.  Looking not backwards, but just as I am, rising to sojourn with my Lord, His Name, Jesus, who blushes with me over Poppa’s love and generous heart to extravagant gifts.  “Jesus”, I say, and I giggle like I am being tickled with a blowing kiss of sensational affection. 

Taking me to a faster heartbeat, the wind rocks me to its fascinating strikes.  I laugh with delight as it covers me with His observation.  Giving up my time, my own hungers, my wondering, seems as if it were my choice; and yet His love was so charming, my mind only switched to see His face , hear His sound, and I was overcome with gracious beauty.  Now I wonder but in a new kingdom, with same need for time and hungers but the choices for my appetite streams from heaven’s rain.   Difference in kingdoms is that one kingdom is for what it offers now and then dissolves, but His kingdom offers the astonishment of now - to live eternal.  I have tasted the love of my Lord and I set into the eternal.

Hear the sound, oh I hear the sound and it draws me to never return to the kingdom of now.  How painful are the pleasures that fade.  How precious the kingdom of eternal.

Gathering from His Sound that drips love with every step.  Like a sound released to never find end is love exchanged in the kingdom of eternal.  Like a wanderer in search of east from west, never finding the wall.  His Sound, His love breaks the enemy my soul entertains that I am not enough, I am not of worth.  It melts the steel wall built to withstand shame and kisses away guilt.  His Name Jesus explodes freedom to never stop until eternal reigns to shout Poppa’s love above all things.  Swelling upon, within, around the vessels of his creation; accomplishing His perfect will done with zealous pleasure.  “Jesus”, the Name sings known and unknown knowledge to man.  “Jesus”, the Name moves known and unknown joys to wreck the enemy that was sent to put down the glory of such sound.

I Am His Pride Of Who He Is

Thank You Poppa

 for times with Your Face before me 

and Your Grace upon me..!!!

Rocking back and forth in my chair as His Substance whirls like a sweet voice that has entered, and the emotions of my soul consumes what it brings me.  Daily I wish… oh I long to be the creation that runs to His feet and sits… sits, as what He is all about has my eyes and my attention.  

Where is the Holy Mountain… oh, it is the cloak that is rendered to give my cold body warmth to mend my sadness.  For I was taken away by silliness and He is furious at what took a child’s innocence.  Our innocence.  But watching me run, watching me weep in His Love as I jump to be held and whirled by His Voice into the air that causes me to giggle again like the child He made me, tickles Him into showing me off to all the eternal of who He is.  

How sensitive His whole being is that I have more than enough to find the Light of His Joy.  For watching me crawl, walk, or run…I am His pride of who He is.  

He sees YOUR TEARS,

 my gift from Him,

my sisters and brothers of love…!!!  

Crawl, walk or run… 

the giggle of love you give Him 

is delightful.

Oh to be looking for Him.  To climb over the hills and look under rocks to find the Word that whispers but has the power of untold changes.  Sifting for me like a filter, instructions for my next clue, my next adventure that will surprise me like a gift for no reason.  

Brightly coloring His steps so I can pick up on His wonder and enjoy the race; as each glimpse breaks me into laughter.   Behind every turn, He listens for my steps so that He can lead as a calm Poppa with such confidence in His plan for me.  

Spirit flows - 

as together 

the teaching I receive along the way 

has the flavor 

I was craving.  

When I do not know which emotion to release, the trees and fields of the world around me burst into the praise of dancing to encourage me keep going, Trinity is speaking.  Lifting their strong hold so as to decorate for Poppa; as long as needed!   Spirit raising me to meet Word, I look for His Son, Jesus.   

Oh to be looking for Him…!

I know no love like His.

Lonely And Ashamed

Poppa, I am lonely and yet I feel ashamed for saying this.  

For the extreme You went to - so I would have eternal as companionship within a kingdom of no sorrow.  But the embrace that I have grown accustom to moves without my control.  It walks in and I melt, it walks out and I slowly become squeezed until I can’t breathe.  Nothing works, nothing takes me to this place except the wind of its directional focus.  The holiness of something so beyond me; the bread that is so not of this world, working and living to be the real in my life.  I crumble as my body weakens to plead for what I do not know how to find.  My eyes look for what I know not what to see.  Searching, with tears; listening with an inner ear that can only hope for the sounds that it can recognize as the song of wisdom.  Deep goes the hold that with my prayer, I will find the invisible and unheard sounds that will feed my soul.  I take with me my family, my spouse, my sisters and brothers, my mom, my dad; the children given me to somehow show Your Face.  I groan with need, I groan with passion, I groan with hope; for there is no safety in this world.  There is only ‘things’ bought to represent safety; but all is vapor.  Treasures that color themselves with greed to lure its victims to think they can create a safe room. 

Who is this Holy?  Who is this One that flickers and I find I want nothing else.  A solid rather than a temporary!  What is this that makes me want to sell everything and follow.  Rising to fall again, gaining to see loss, listening to know deafness; I continue to reach.  Why does its place often take me to the tears that leave me feeling cleaner than when I entered?  How does this wind blow? 

Wondering in complications, wishing for a brighter star to guide me; suddenly I arrive and I know not where or how to get here.  Without notice, as I sit so unsatisfied, I simply asked to be completed; it rushes in to be the full I so longed for.  Mercy saves me and I wobble with a stuffed heart as I experience full from such wind of comfort.  The crack of my smile reveals something new just happened and I stop to love the moment.  New begins to share and I listen to its love speak on my hearts question "I am lonely."

‘Alone’ shows me its purpose as it holds my heart close.  It opens my knowledge to make me feel special and places me holding something no one else can mimic or be.  ‘Alone’ now feels like the missing piece that completes a beautiful whole.  I was only ‘alone’ so I could realize I could never be replaced or a substitute could never fit my existence.  I am His desperation and He is mine.  I was made to worship and be the twinkle of His eye.  When it feels like life is getting squeezed out of me, when I allow outside manna fill my heart rather than heavenly manna, ‘ALONE’ is there to guide me back to see things His way instead of mine.  ‘ALONE’ is the gift to know I am wondering beyond the fresh stream that was built to keep me moist and soft in His passion.  I have been eating junk food for days and wondering why my stomach hurts, instead of rich delightful foods from a banqueting table He keeps fresh from the garden of heaven’s supply grown for only me.  

We live and breathe in His kingdom (the Name of Jesus) with sweet hungry for the variety the wind brings to those who sell all and follow.

May I always remember ‘Alone’ is a story of great love to find…!  And never be ashamed to say I am lonely again; for I am designed with this gift so that I will run back to 'be' and 'receive' His love that is only between Him and I.  

Christians Are The Biggest Killers, He Said

Eternal gathering to praise One that sits beside the Father.  How loud the questions on earth of One so God/man.  How precious is the conversations as we seek His Name.

Beautiful heart, one I met today.  “Jesus is not the way”, he says, “what a folly”.  

I felt unknown, I felt as if I were standing with a name but no substance.  Funny my reaction to a bold, well thought through conclusion. 

Conversation continued and I heard, “you’re different” he says.   

It was as if a faintly image of my soul began to be visible.  Smiles mixed with a few high pitches, eyes piercing as if it must go deep into my being declares, 

“Paul created Christianity and Christians are the biggest killers.”   

Oh my heart begins to pray, ‘Poppa, you love this one, I know.  Touch places I can’t go.’  Out comes history, pain filled history a life obviously struggled to make pieces form reasons.  I cry with my heart with him.  

I still my need to be right, my foolish want to overpower painful wrong with ‘my’ truth that will cut and leave him dead AGAIN by a Christian.  I openly declare the God I seek is so vast, so far from my conclusions.  

We meet together under excitement that people can speak one on One to God.  We find strength.  

Stories begin to flow back and forth, stories far beyond what we can ever totally understand that the bible gives.  

But voiced from pain he says, “Folly, created to throw human against human.” 

Again his confidence shows many years of spreading.  But strange how love works.  It loses attack mode when all the bullets have been removed.  He says the ‘Name’ Jesus and shares what a wise man He was, not God, but a wise man.  Cracks begin to happen and I believe he knows it, but since ‘safe zone’ is our stand, comments further to give even another wonder for me to ponder.  He admits that he practices what Jesus teaches.  Yum, that throws me into a search.  

I listen and then it comes to the resurrection and though he is convinced it too is folly, his approach is amazingly weakened.  Finally before we return to our own individual focus, 

he says, “a mystery, it remains the biggest mystery, the resurrection.” 

~

Poppa, I seek You, I am subject to so many threats and accusations and I fall so short of knowing.  Why have we tangled our laws to strangle the souls of another?  Oh Teacher, teach me.  See my books, see my paper, see my heart open to learn.  See me sit under the Word that is and was with God and became flesh.  Forgive me when I rise up and strike my thoughts to others like a knife I intend it to be.   I lay at Your feet and I listen to the song as You sing.  

Peace - Lost Connection With My Sinful Heart

Sweet sounds not heard around me

Released from my heart to Yours, Lord. 

My smile speaks a whisper

that I continue to give,

as it reveals what my thoughts create

from seemingly the same thought

yet it generates as if it is new,

moment by moment. 

Silence is not silent at all

but shooting forth from my being

like an explosion heard from city to city. 

I have touched love and it gives light. 

I have touched love and it soars to His throne

this message I send. 

I fall toward the suggestion to come. 

Close my eyes in surrender to its pleasure. 

I have lost connection

with my sinful heart

and walked into glory,

which defines

His realm of Peace.  

My breath becomes irregular as I try to consume too much cloud that has engulfed me.  

I pause to soak love in return for my entrance.  My heart begins to sing.  

Sing oh heart, sing the Name that it beats for…!  I hear its sound; hear it now…. Ahhhha ahhhhhh  J-E-S-U-S, the Name sounding, coming in waves of tinkling notes then pounding to beats of loud attendance.  Jesus, again the Name sounds and a magnitude of pictures pose before me to bring His face so beautiful.  Ahhhhh, ahhhhhhh Jesus, softening now, ahhhh Jesus, His Name sounds, and I melt as if it is a substance pouring over me.  

I cry for I am so lost and He assures me ‘never’.  “But”, I want to say; and He takes me and somehow I know He has this amazing understanding that is all of what heaven is about.  

My face exposes my cry - I can’t live how I want to live, just and holy before Him.  I sob from inside out, for His pureness brings out such difficulties within me. 

He steps in front of me and it’s as if I see His eyes looking across to me, eyes to Eyes reaching to each other.  We stare.  I do not know what He will say.  

I wait.  

I wait.  

I wait.  

Then, weakening by His love speaking, I am encouraged to sit, rest. I become aware of the tightness that had griped me like a rope around me heart.  I inhale as I begin to feel a change.  I breathe in again His gaze, for He remains before me.  

I look again with a heart that loves but stretches too hard to find.  Could it be, could it really be? A resting that brings its wonders greater than any sleep could ever perform.  Could this moment be a Sabbath my soul longs for.  

It’s like I am in a garment created for me, totally outfitted for comfort.  I lose the sense of where I am for my neck has to twist and turn to examine freedom it is having a hard time understanding.  

My soul has the softness of rain refreshing the air I breathe to the dry ground my heart walks with.  My shoulders are loosed and I raise them to verify what I feel is real.  

My arms are lifted to the sky as His Name again begins to form from my thoughts to a song I want to sing.  A song that dances with every word spoken. 

Jesus, You mark my heart with joy.

Your glory colors my eyes with songs.

I dance as Your Name showers me with heaven.

Jesus, keep me everywhere You are

That I lose connection with my sinful heart.

I love You, I love You, I love You.

Jesus, You win my love in abundance.

Your the song that makes me dance.

I bring my heart to play in the kingdom of Your Name 

Jesus, keep me everywhere You are

That I lose connection with my sinful heart.

I love You, I love You, I love you.