Draft Announcing A Hurricane

The needs of the heart, Poppa, 

are constantly moving about 

to find places to ring its sounds and actions. 

At times the mind wants to find a place to stall, or make void the thinking process; but I'm not sure if that is healthy. Sleep has been designed to give something supernatural; rest and entrance for a play field of thoughts.  I really hope to keep that clean as well. 

The whispers of trails to venture off the safe road can trip my stand, so I call out for brighter paths and guidance in the dark. To stay in the place You dwell. 

Your Presence, I love the song that constantly plays. Busy takes on a fascinating appearance. Sometimes it looks like the slow motion of the moon rising. Like I can see it move, but I can't. Then I blink and its made another climb. Soon, it has brightened the whole earth.  

My heart has jumped into the beauty of the seven wonders of this earth, and exceeds their fascination.

I'm like a draft 

announcing a hurricane. 

My praise rises to break open the Heaven's. And One so holy spills from the throne a gracious thought to ponder and chew, find delicious; which is what comes to those who taste the Lord and see He is good.  Now, the thoughts roll about like a hurricane strikes... uplifting all the loose debris of faithless struggles.  Carrying it away to be cast in the sea. 

Changing me to be new, not placing His wonders in old wine skins but in new.  Often causing everything within me to dance, starting with my face - turning sadness and fear into smiles and hope.  The face dances with new countenance and slowly moves to build throughout my whole being. 

And then the real play begins. The real that took me over into abundance rather than my lack. My song rather than my pity. My rejoice instead of complaints. I walk in the unknown of my Father's joy over me. 

Like a child unaware of eyes that can discern safety, I move only while staying close. I can hear His voice rising to come back, I move back.  

Living in the realm of visiting angels, for He is the God of angel armies!

Mom Says She Sees Babies

I just had to write about what happened this morning. I surrender to the possibilities of being on or off about this. I simply write from my experience and from love flowing so sweetly to myself and my mom alone in a room... or maybe not. She has dementia but she has always known the Lord as personal and the answer to all problems.

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Watching my mom today and I enter a different world than my own. My world is blemished with sorrow from expected acts centered around me and for me, but mom's... well, hers has entered into a quiet wait. Waiting most of her minutes for and with only what is happening now.  

Watching with a stare that creates in me such a deep desire to go to this place of content, where there is no temptation to look aside.  A mighty Sound that pulls her full attention to just watch. Looking up with such a carefree escape to watch this move of space held for her viewing only.  

I can't help but come closer myself. She has the look of an angel. I dare the entrance with her as I ask, "Mom, I would love to see what you see!" She continues to fix her eyes on something above. I believe I am with her, for she appears to feel safe, but I am not her focus.  She has the Greater. 

I watch her eyes gently make slight moves, but very slight. Only as if to catch the ride of this visual. I find contentment in just taking moments of glances her way. In my time, about 15 minutes pass and she somewhat clears her throat. Out comes, "ahh, babies!" I move from my comfort and come close to her. "Are you seeing babies, mom?"  Without being distracted by me or giving me her focus she says, "Yeah!" 

And so there it was; I wanted to see what she sees. My heart began to immediately think and visualize my own little baby world. So precious, so needful of a watchful eye. Wandering in an open play with each other as the exploring mind will taste and feel its surroundings with such a delight. Experiencing sour and sweet, but experiencing.

I wanted to capture what was supernatural. For to feast and renew the mind now, is the later extreme blessing Poppa God gave us, when He told us to renew the mind; for it harbors distraction of this world but He is providing a Kingdom where Heaven is on earth. 

I got my camera.  My focus was upon her face, so beautiful, so in that glow. Then I followed to extend where her eyes gave directions. There was a light. The same light we turn on and off daily but through this visual aid called phone camera, I saw a different glow. I immediately dismissed this phenomenon and just as quickly knew it was a spectacular look into what she might be seeing. 

There were millions and millions of sparkled light specks. They sort of all blended in to form a light glow and yet I was amazed at their individuality. Some would dip slightly while others just floated in place. What was this? Where are the babies? Is this heavenly babies? I only knew to enjoy the moment.

I watched the video and was elated at what I saw. I had to show my sisters. I had to share a moment of what mom might be experiencing beyond our understanding but within a delicate image of God's Glory. I sent it through Messages. I then watched it.... oh no. It wasn't the same? What is different? Too small, too deluded. I know, I will put it on Face Book where Chris, my sister, said a prayer for miracles today. Asked that we know what mom is saying by way of miracle. 

I downloaded it with excitement. Then I watched it. Again, it was different. As I began to study the video, I realized the difference, I had a spark of Moses moment where I saw the glory, it was now gone. The glow was no longer a visual. 

No sparks, no floaters, no longer in that moment. But the life it brought was or can only be explained by my heart from my heart.  I walked into a prayer this morning. I saw a prayer form into a substance. I entered this unknown. I truly can say I don't understand. I am free to hear the Sound of His Name, Jesus! A Sound was not heard... and yet a Sound was power on earth.

Chris' prayer from the heart of God's love in her...

I pray our day will be blessed with the presence of our Heavenly Father. We miss our dad and the conversations we all had that would make us laugh or make us think. We miss his encouragement over taking care of mom, how he showed us to be consistent in showing up and "be there" even when we are hurting. 

God we need you to help mom to help us know how we can be of service to her, when she can't talk it out to us, Father God please talk for her, in our mind. 

Miracles are your desire for us, we play them down, almost forgetting you are still a God of Miracles. Today, we will be bold and ask for miracles of knowledge as we walk this path we are in, guide us with strength that only comes from upon high, in Jesus name we pray! 

I love you so so so much Lord.  Thank You for the gift of Salvation that you have filled our life with ...

A Little Of God

Shaking, trembling, stumbling with the high of what is before me. The greatest of all, Lord and King over the earth. Oh my soul is divided in two.  On earth but wanting the very roar of Heaven come. 

What season is this? What is the rights of this day? How can my eyes hear and see what is about me, all about me? To receive the wonders of something so unobtainable except by coming before the essence of unknown. 

Call me as I arrive to place my heart as the offering. What do I have to lose? I have only to gain when I take on Your flood. The scare is only because I have not surrendered my own self made life preserving way. 

But can I live without a heart? No, and I want it to be totally surrendered to the work of Spirit's bringing back to life. It's lonely with the life sustaining gadgets about me. I've pipes in my mouth, tubes in my veins and I cannot call out or even signal anyone to remove all these life lines man made. 

I must have the drip from God's IV and not man's. The night is soon to come and I want to be ready. Only Your light has the path. 

Taking Your blessings, I soak in quiet peace. I'm stretching from an awakening and fresh breath brings back oxygen of beautiful energy from Heaven's reign. A little is beyond minds comprehension. Like looking at the earth as it is and then thinking of its size among the galaxy, the Touch of a little from You is incomprehensible. 

So I float in this 'little' touch and weep for how significant it is for my future. I laugh because I was so unaware of what little is to the mind of man. To my mind that thought it was so smart until this little touch changes the wind, the angels assignments, the whisper of my praise kept the rocks from crying out. 

The little has the strength to bury years of depression because an evening touch was given to me to experience. Sickness of heart turned to overcome as a little touch made life different forever more. 

Depression Is...

Father, this mystery of such height, I can only float to its water flow. I am nameless until You bring on my name. I can feel separated and drowning in despair without this fear that has delight as the fixed connection to belong. 

For depression is the weak union, where one is unknowing a fountain is exploding inside the heart. The pressure to soak is so mighty, a reaction has to be given to lift up, let out; spread forth the rhythm of what we are created for. 

A hunger for daily bread will give such glory to wisdom, the Spirit of His Word on earth.  Just as the rocks will cry out to worship if high praise is softened to dull, so will the soul cry for daily bread and fall under burdened and barren if not feasting on bread that moistens the hardened heart unfed.  

Take hold, see the ribbons of praise spewing into this land from my heart to decorate life and the air that I breathe.  See the lift and waves they make to sound forth the eternal timeless beauty of what you create as more glorious than the birds of the air.  

Show the awesome welcome of incomparable love returned to You from the mix of all I have learned of You.   See how it brings me joy from being clothed by Your Love. 

Soaked in this mystery forever. Knowing that when my heart drops, I need but come to the river and swim about in beauty that moves my inner heart to new outward appearance of radiance.   

Lost in assurance.  Consumed in abundance.  Weary of nothing. Depressed forgotten. Laboring only in following the feast of being together forever.  Forever, and EVER…!!!

Pocket Surprises

The time has come. The time has come! 

I live again something so fresh, it is partaken as a constant and yet it has no duplicate. I've come to new, fresh, unpackaged... straight from the throne that rules with such beautiful music, my soul is changed upon every click of now to now. 

The experience is named and built as a greater. Filling out peace on earth, good will to man/woman. The dry bones of want pleads for this rapid river to keep drenching as the guard of my heart wars off the intruder of mindless thoughts. Staying in truth so I can offer me and not someone He does not know.  Recklessly listening to hear a crumbling heart so I can run to push down its remaining hardness, for I am here.  The time has come for yet another unveiling mystery. 

I find love much like I find money in a forgotten pocket's safety.  It was there all along but it had never crossed my mind to look.  Suddenly it is cold and my hands slip into a comfortable position, a pocket of mysteries. Expecting empty but finding riches, the retreat adds a smile and story to tell of a surprise. 

His love has so many benefits. Should I waste it? Should I take such a rich find and spend it on silence or shout out my find of big opportunity. What and how can I put this Good News to its fullest sound? 

Packed in my hands, my heart throws a party. A song spills that requires an army to sing and my decision is made. I join my gift found to invest in His kingdom. Together we put our treasures found. and suddenly. the very picture of the Father who Jesus wanted us to see is before our eyes. Walking and talking on earth as it is in heaven. His kingdom has come.!!!

Secret Place

Intimacy with God can be confusing. We often think of a relationship among us humans on how to relate to what this might mean, and rightly so. A relationship starts with basic facts. Important facts, but maybe only the highlights of events and emotions.  The journey continues and a deep desire for deeper causes the relationship to honor each other with greater than surface information. 

For relationship to grow, there is a call, a beckoning of hearts to the inner dare for a challenge. The secrets one holds far away from all others.  The good, bad and ugly. The questions too hard. The break down of walls built from as far back as your mind allows memory. A deeper relationship screams for a chance to be life, as the death of secrets fall to their exposure. 

Intimacy enters the secret place. Not just the pretty but the complete package. Now… we have become one. Weeping and/or dancing, my hiding is over. Submitting (sharing oneself, not obedience to their laws - that must come under God's Love) is the beginning of intimacy. Who am I gets a workout. The outcome or the results of this act is always yet to be seen. Intimacy is not foreknowledge, but great knowledge to be expected and experienced (who I am and who they are). New and always like the first time… inexperienced and yet delighted in the mystery of it all.

So now marriage takes on completely a sacred intimacy unavailable to anyone else. My secret place goes even deeper.  I share my body at all cost. I hold back nothing and allow my husband to complete an exploration. Questions and answers add delight as this journey wears intimacy as the covering God wanted to guide me to... Him and I.  

Dare to open such intimacy? Exposure through submitting oneself is a great risk. So why do it? Only through Christ’s example of His Father and being His Son is the answer to this. Only after understanding that any submission outside of Christ is not only never asked of us but dangerous consequences will occur.  Intimacy outside God’s realm is giving a person or people the right to write your life under their judgement instead of God’s Love. It’s harsh and deadly. 

Intimacy through submitting (myself) to another by understanding that dwelling in the Secret Place of the Most High, I have no judgement. I am abiding under the Shadow of the Almighty (Ps 91).

Our Secret Place

The thrill of anticipation, oh Master... my Jesus. Touching into just a nibble as Your Presence begins to fill the atmosphere in which I breath.   I'm in that beginning Poppa, where I'm still wondering what will I say to You. What will I do? Actually, I know this all seems unimportant once the connection takes me away from my mind's demand for understanding.   But soon, as anyone so in love knows, the actual Touch has the heart carefully trembling. Peace, the sacred feel that is exempt of struggle, and yet it pleases the heart with deep wells of desires, fills my face with an expression. For I must meet Love with sincerity, honesty of who I am, so I do not deceive myself but receive the Beauty of a love connection.  Encountering Real... His Real and my real. I so want to have this secret with Him. Our Secret Place.

For there, my love blooms into new attire. New ring upon my finger as I accept the sweet gifts of Song circling about my weakness. Taking me, to believe and trust where His Eyes look upon me, is just what He wanted.  And the silence draws me to such a Holy, I become it's silence also. No longer can be touched by another's defining. I have been won to Him and I would surrender anything. I have now entered a glorious phase where I could ask anything, for Love controls. Love is a miracle, a miracle the heart reaches to watch and consume each second as the delicate luxurious gift it is. Our Secret Place.

Roaming within this endless visual is the crowd of all those in such Love. For only this sort of swelling encounter can add yet another mention of His sweet Name. Cripples, blind, deaf, dumb... there is no lock out or rule that one must be without blemish. The Call is to come and be blessed. Come, bring your burdens and take His Yoke, for it is easy. Surrender all your stipulations for His Grace, and find it is sufficient.  Allow the fast move, that convinced you it was best, to be the slow soaking consuming multitude of frazzled chattered for worship and wisdom in single breaths.  Listening first with intention of finding what is found, not what is raced after. Where deep is one word at a time, swallowed and enjoyed like the precious jewel it is. Gathered and put together, one has colors of habitat in His Glory. Your Secret Place builds and mansions are designed after its beauty. He is preparing many for you.  Our Secret Place.

I know only to come and dine. Stay and linger. Play and sing. Rejoice and be glad. Wade around in puddles of sweet rain. Watch the sun set and rise again. In whatever state I am, I find perfect peace as I ponder Love in our Secret Place. Stirring over and over for one more word to hold and devour as my slow dance carry's it to my being where I live and move in You. Our Secret Place. The Silent Place where Your Voice dwells. Sounding deep in our Secret Place.

(Written while suffering with the flu.)