Dancing with my heart, my words, my song, and my love, before my God…

But let all who take refuge in you be glad; let them ever sing for joy. Spread your protection over them, that those who
LOVE YOUR NAME may rejoice in you. Psalms 5:11

Friday, April 22, 2011

Scared Of The Deep

Father God, I come this morning as a child to sit upon Your Lap… maybe just to cry.  I’m so stumped this morning.  I can’t seem to gather a direction because it feels like there is just too much happening that feels sad to my heart.  It frustrates me because on the other hand I can see Your Hand making the Giant Steps in my life that are so obviously Your Work.  So all I know to do is bring it to You.  You are so faithful to Correct my thoughts to pull me out of darkness or unknown dead ends of selfish attractions rather than the Better Goals of Your Road.  I feel like I’m on a huge wave and I can’t tell if it is pulling me to shore or taking me out into the deep ocean.  I can feel the Joy of Floating and yet unable to see what is in the waters, I whine in fear.  I’m afraid like a child in a dark room calling for her daddy to come check out all the closets and under the bed.  I want the light on so that I don’t have to sleep in a dark room.  I need Your Voice to tell me everything is okay. Tell me You have Looked at all my surroundings and Secured the Doors and nothing is here to harm me.  Can You Sing a Song about me like my daddy did in those times when I felt so lost in fear as his child.  Can You Hold me close so that I no longer care whether it is dark or light, I am safe.  I can’t reach the light switch because I’m scared to put my foot on the floor.  I can only cry in the night for You to Hear me because I know You’ll Come, You always do.  My fears begin to calm even when I hear You Rising and those Powerful Soft Footsteps are Sounded; for I know You will not stop until You Reach me.  Your Soft Voice Speaking, ‘What is the matter?’   I embarrassingly say, ‘I hear too many voices talking to me.’  And the Song Begins.  I am Your Daughter and You Find Pleasure in me.   My mom and daddy on earth is of great age now and now I need to tell them all is okay.  I need to sing to them that they are my greatest treasures on earth.  Thank You for Showing me how to Love, and how to be Loved by this example of my own parents.  All You Want for me is to Love and all avenues of life will be Guided.  So this morning, as I struggle to gather a direction, I will chase Love and Friendship will be my Guard against darkness.  For if I have Love, I will be Stationed at Your House and all Things are of Your Design; and Safety is an eternal Promise as worries and fears are left outside.  Thank You for checking all the noises and unfamiliar sounds for me and Giving me the Okay that all is Safe.  While I stay in this Place I will Rest as the Beautiful Song You Sing Gives me Peace. 

SOFTLY  HE  SPEAKS:  You are MINE, You are the creation of my Longing.  My Eyes have Watched the sunrises as your beginning was just as delightful as your end upon earth.  I Called You and you came running.  When I Reach to Hold your hand you giggle and often will shrink but soon realize I want to Take you somewhere Special.  I Loved how you climbed and rarely was afraid of heights.  Climbing into New Places as you would explore My Territories.  I Love Touching your heart with a Thirst for My Rain; Watching you Play in My Rain is so Delightful.  Do not be afraid of the Deep.  I have My Eyes everywhere.  Under you, over you, beside you, and completely around you.  I Am and you are Mine.