Dancing with my heart, my words, my song, and my love, before my God…

But let all who take refuge in you be glad; let them ever sing for joy. Spread your protection over them, that those who
LOVE YOUR NAME may rejoice in you. Psalms 5:11

Wednesday, April 24, 2013

Shaken In Piercing Love Attacks

Reach to all the hiding places, Lord.  

The places that I try so hard 
to hide from You.  

As I walk so softly to these nightmares, 
I know that Spirit 
has my hand 
and I can be healed of these unknowns.   

You are so mighty 
that You can heal 
what I don’t know, 
while I walk not knowing 
it was walking 
I was unable to do.  

I search for only my eyes to be open, 
to love that fills this hunger 
You created in me.   

Watching Your work 
in me 
causes me to breath differently; 
more focused to life 
rather than some expected end.  

Your work gives this disturbance 
of my empty soul 
a shock that turns all bitter into sweet.  

With every nip that goes through me, 
squeezes me to take notice, 
I rush to the next nibble 
I might find if I dare to look.  

What are You doing, 
my soul responds?  

What did You say, 
my heart questions?  

Why did You come, 
my mind tries to keep up?  

When does this change my soul 
to the rich eyes of understanding?  

Created in me 
is this love for Your Name, 
the Kingdom Jesus brought, 
and yet the fight 
to bring in my trash, 
my dirty clothes 
to the city of Pure.  

Forgive me Beautiful One 
as I look upon such wonder, 
set me as an example 
of Your passion 
by allowing me to see freedom 
in giving up my life.  

My eyes open 
to see the fire 
that burns upon the earth.  

Oh that I give You all glory 
that I might be 
in the mysterious grove of passion 
that takes a hold of my heart 
so what I see 
is the un-matched sounds 
of Holy while it works in me.  

Shaken with piercing love attacks, 
I roll in the softness 
of reestablishing the foundation 
of Your purpose for mankind.  

The east is not far enough 
from the west 
to show how large 
Your love is for me.  

Asleep in the Rest 
of Your care, 
I place my days 
for the total maximum 
I could obtain 
from Your eminent friendship.  

For I am a wondering pilgrim, 
set on staying 
inside this kingdom of Jesus’ Name.  

Unfolding is the Spirit 
that sing in this kingdom 
that rescues me 
from all harm (my own disorders) 
and washes my feet 
that I walk 
in His pure life given.

Thursday, April 18, 2013

Do You Really Want To Waste Your Love On Me

How grateful to know my own love could NEVER exceed God’s love and yet ridiculously how many times I measure God’s love according to how I love another.  For surely God ‘would do’ this or He ‘wouldn't work' this way - completely operating from my own conclusions.

I must remind myself; for I fail desperately in loving those assigned to walk in my path; creation He loves..!

And I do not speak such foolishness to work into some sort of condemning place for mankind but to ponder the wondrous love that reaches so far past my own love or what I have seen and analyzed as love. With great desire I plead to understand more of His ravishing love and allow it to pour upon me, for only then can I give freely.  Each portion of His love that imparts within my heart is potential for abundance to change me and those I wish to love. 

Oh to lift up my soul and experience what it does inside and all around me. 

To humbly cry.  Cry for whatever it takes to wait as love develops, even through my impurities, the cracking crumbling of my hardened heart for His hand to mend. 

Be still oh my soul.  Peace reach to the fallen heart that whines for unhealthy love of mankind and  turn me inside out so that I am open for real love.  With the greatest stretch I look for Hope.  Seeking Hope’s face to hold my arms too often weary. 

Hope, take away the voice inside that wants divine love wrapped up in pretty man made smiles, please; as I scream out of control…don’t forget to mention all I have faithfully called ‘good’. 

But miraculously, even on this edge of insanity, His heart of spotless pure motives, sweep in with precious love rules of unmerited, undeserved grace to cover all my missing marks, with His assortment of perfect discipline.

Deeper and deeper insight walks to pick me up, shows me how ‘I’ am singled out with the dynamics of every cell in my body, this love that proves it will not remove its eyes from me.

Captured by tender thoughts, 
yet while I am being carried 
I caution God, 
Do you really 
want to waste 
Your love on me?”  

Again I measure my worth according to how I might love even my deepest loves.  Easily I have concluded how one could get along without me. 

It’s as if then I see 
His tears begin to form 
for the loss He feels.  

Now, I've done it…!  But I dare to take a second look, He remains in a stance of waiting.  Somehow I feel He will wait day and night for me. Really, I think? 

Oh God, REALLY, day and night? 

I begin to  see a new picture.  A picture of His son Jesus, there on the cross waiting to die.  Hanging in pain with hope for me.  That "Hope"  I keep looking for, was taken to extreme so I could carry its power in every situation I would cross.  Hope for now, hope for my future, hope for my children, hope for the eternity spoken of for me.  

Hope, precious hope that enters a bride in waiting, as her eyes frantically watch all details to be its best within her creative heart and mind.  

The joy of hope begins to swell as love plants itself within the soil of my heart; maturity to being born again into His kingdom. 

My prayer changes…!  Come, oh Holy One, come and show me more about steps to the arms who longed for me before I was born.  It isn't about me any more, it is about His love.  This heart stopping pain where I cannot believe His love so deep, disappears.  His most precious gift was sent and hope stirs all my senses to hear each plea made for me to be lead to His lap that He might cuddle me in riches and rejoice in His creation of me.  

Hear me sing to the dance of such love, I am Yours…!  This hope is Your Hope in me!

Friday, April 12, 2013

Dance is Jesus Thoughts Turned to Music

Sweet Lord, 
I want to dance 
Your grace tonight. 

I want to dance the song 
that is in my being 
to the lifting of my soul.  

Actions that lock me down, 
be released 
to follow not after my own good 
but with the Name I love 
upon my lips 
for who You are forever more.  

Jesus, see my eyes dancing 
with my gaze turned 
to include my smile 
as my thoughts become music 
I respond to.  

As the beauty of what I hear 
keeps my moves rising, 
I hold the power of this kingdom 
running its aroma 
to fill me body, soul, and spirit. 

Your love kisses 
my emotions 
to assure my dance is enjoyed 
as You seek the earth 
for those joining in truth 
to declare this perfect song.  

Skipping my feet 
with the run 
of a million sounds about me, 
I dance to a few here and there 
that speak love to my ears.  

Grabbing paths that connect all things 
to the center of this attraction, 
the Lord Jesus Christ, 
I stop to breath in such a sight.  

I fold my hands about my chest 
and open them upward 
to dance my vow 
to love You forever 
with all that I can 
and as often as I might.  

The stereo of blended tunes 
bless the stage of this worship dance 
formed from thoughts of Jesus.  

Tears shine upon sparkled dance floors 
as servants breaks chains 
and join the dance 
that comes from death to life.  

Hear the music, 
the sounds of His Name 
from the core of hearts 
surrendering to the forever God.  

See the dance of saints 
as beauty floats 
from their mouth 
and bounces from soul to soul.  

Songs of what Jesus has done 
spring forth 
and its melody causes feet to dance.  

A mighty roar waves about the sky 
as it holds tremendous power of praise.   

Hearts forget themselves 
and become focused 
on what is pouring from Father’s heart.  

Dancing is a response 
from Jesus thoughts 
turned into music. 

Wednesday, April 10, 2013

What I Search For

Poppa, going deeper and deeper to You, Your identity, Your deity; walking about the royal house, I seem to have to dig within me - as well as dig within what is written, what is said about You, to find more.  I speak or ask to know more but then it seems as if it is impossible to know You lest I search to the inner parts of my own soul.  I'm talking so real with self, it hurts; in that place that tries to shut down, shut off anyone from going there, including and especially myself. Thoughts that float so quietly lest I cast them away; for I know when sounded I would readily not welcome such imagination nor give rights to live within me. "I don’t want to look at that thought," I say…. And so it stays, sitting in wait, sitting still until it can burst out its destruction it has intended to produce; patient to wait its full sin.

I want more of You and yet if I do not search for honesty of who I am or what is it I search, I remain clueless and/or without manna that my heart knows as perfect.  Speaking the imperfections of others somehow slip easily from my lips as Spirit knows well the faults of evil.  But to turn light and truth inward; to allow Holy to guide its shining brilliant light freely about all my still motionless charged self-facts would be stirring up mud in water I want to drink.  My mind fights this logic of sanctification by the wonders of holiness You are.

But oh how thirsty I am today!  My heart speaks as with unknown tongues, stirring the deep; melting the cold frozen layers of ice I reserve for my sin to remain.  So I dig to the confessions that want to hide, that I might sing a new song of merriment.  Confessions, dead works that work to the top; so that I find total redemption this righteousness brings to my life. Your commandments are so pure and wise.  

What do I search for?
Poppa, like a star standing in its perfect place to reflect such a light that gives it such beauty -  this beauty I long for; for it is what gives me complete satisfaction when burning through me its work.  

What I search for?
When You see if there be any wicked way in me, I am released from chains about my heart that I did not know was even there.  The weight of such silly sin became a part of my daily run and I just thought it was supposed to be.  

What I search for?
I openly plea for Your perfect light, so I dance right out of chains.  I sing my repentance and You laugh with me as I experience Your commitment to keep me fully pleasing.

As a parent guarding and guiding a child to a full future, Your absolute, Your path for me is my meditation.  I am distracted but fail to find just what distraction misguided me so I come now and say purify me.  Cleanse me as I plunge into this river of mercy for the richer things, Your gaze.  

What I search for?
I cannot do this on my own so I ask to be enlightened.   I know You will never leave me and yet this must be assured in constant revelations of love pouring through me in discipline and pardon as sin blinds me. 

Ultimately....What I search for?
I need more of who You are and less of who I am.  Help me identify the differences…!

Monday, April 8, 2013

Jealousy - The Door To Love

I have a constant busy mind 
and yet my soul never stops 
yearning for Your gaze, 
Your presence, 
which seems to stop 
all the circulation of information.  

Not that I just stand 
in this delight, 
this joy 
for its moment only; 

but that I gather luxuriant 
this passage presents.  

What my eyes just caught 
before this entrance 
will then make common 
into uncommon, 
and its meaning will pour throughout me 
with its unique diverse picture 
of Your Door to Love
as it pulls me past its frame 
and on to its room 
much broader 
than my mind could expand to 

Inside I will feel 
Your jealous want of me 
and find it puzzling; 
but as I accept this heart, 
Your heart, 
I will begin to find 
my own jealous extremes 
that I would never 
put another god before You 
and my own yearning
that You never put another
before me.  

There it becomes plain 
so I might get a portion 
of this wonder.  

I was created 
separate from any other.  

was made 
from Your image 
to be eternally enjoyed 
and have joy 
as this jealousy 
vows its commitment; 

~I in You, You in me~ 

Jealousy holds this bond, 
this Door to Love 
– I am Yours, You are mine 

As jealousy grows, 
love thickens; 
and as outside 
tries to lure 
with higher and higher fascination, 
hearts with history 
fight to be one fiercely.  

Storms come 
to knock down this 
Door to Love
for such mighty beauty 
such jealousy
about the universe.  

But jealous love, 
I in You, You in me

…. It forms one, 
not two....

Friday, April 5, 2013

So Condemned My Heart Moves

Condemned, so condemned my heart moves yet You speak against this conclusive score.  But then why do I add all things up and come so short.  Why this irrevocable display before action and after action pounding to win its determined residence.  Why is sight positioned to toil against seasons of weakness, committed to bring my soul to winter in the heat of wondrous summer?   Why do I fight, with possessiveness, my right to hold to my own strength; and yet I see clearly that weakness is the fate of my days, observing my flesh giving way to death’s claim I return to dust? 
Condemned, domed to come to nothing; verses convicted, rising to favor Your Plan.   So closely woven that only worship, fixing my eyes to the One who bids me rest in the middle of these glaring failures, can divide and bring me to safety rather than falsely suffer in a dooms standing.  Precious is the death that gives me the meditation of new life; transforming my way to new memories of change.  
Bring me the fear of Poppa’s love.  For fear has the wisdom that does not allow false room to roam.  Fear is love wrapped in knowing.  When knowing, who would be foolish to move other ways.  Striking false with fear anoints its piercing point and brings sweet aroma to surface.  Fear produces solid focus with unfaltering vision.
I struggle taking my heart to many devotions and slip on false gods.  Convict with Your promise You love those You discipline.  Raise a standard in me where this fear that towers upon such love, destroys the voice of condemnation, as sweet scented conviction increases to kiss me away from ruin and direct me to abundant joy.   
When accusations attack to question where my treasure is, I want to be found guilty of cherishing the cross, cherishing the discipline that gives You absolute open freedom to say what You must and all words are devoured by my thirsty soul to drink in as if were my last.  I want this covering that gives the angel armies less work on me and more against my enemy.  I yearn for this hand of mercy so kind to trouble wrong within me and shake out distrust for total trust in Savior.  I want my words to be as a song playing in the background of Your love’s exposure.    You sing Poppa, and I will dance to each note.  You pour Poppa, and I will scatter it to icing the land.  I want my steps to be about following, not leading.  Your glory shine and I will reflect its brightness.   
Purify my heart, let me be as gold as I look upon Your Holy. 

Wednesday, April 3, 2013

More Than I Can Hold

Help me Father, 
help me this morning 
with this thrust of my soul 
to worship.  


I find myself wanting to speak 
with such a blast 
that it blows a stairway 
from my thoughts to Your throne 
that I might declare over and over 
the expression “Holy”.  

That I might stand, sit, fall, bow, dance, 
sing this love 
coming from a part of me 
that cannot contain 
what is filling me up.  

Placing within me 
more than I can hold, 
a praise 
that whirls in the walls of my body 
wanting the escape 
and cover You 
with the fragrance of what is happening.  

Angelic dwelling around me 
like a conference is about to start.  

Seating is a stand-only auditorium 
for only hearts are invited.  

A melting of side attractions 
have begun to fade 
as One I am to introduce 
has an entrance 
we await from adoption to the festival.  

Who I am 
cries as warmth 
sets under my soul a fire.  

Who I am 
rises with my voice 
heard in other lands 
as Word fills the earth 
for us to become one 
with Trinity’s Face.  

Nations trembles 
as Holy is released 
to echo 
yesterday, today and forever 
together under God.  

Heaven is in its place 
and falling 
to the souls of those 
who hold Holy 
as its sacred kingdom come.  

Open the pores within me 
that I ooze this worship 
as I pass forth 
Holy, Holy, Holy 
to be sung without stop.  

Beautiful fear be mine.  
Fear that brings wisdom 
so I give my praise 
with washed hands 
and a contrite spirit.  

As I come close Lord, 
as I feel this good pleasure 
of wonders of wonders; 
I desire this fear 
that wakes the passions created in me 
for Your glory 
and slaps down 
the passions my flesh screams for.  

I have Your kindness 
which delivers all things 
to purposely direct my eyes 
to this Holy place.  

Be upon me, 
behold my yearning 
that is bigger than I can hold.  

With my passion 
I now shout 
with air from lungs full of worship 
never to stop 
but into eternity, 

“Holy, Holy, Holy…..”  

Tuesday, April 2, 2013

See Beyond

I am astounded my sweet Lord; 
and when I arrange the emotions 
that come from this outbreak, 
I wonder 
am/was I so dazed.  

I see beyond human kindness this morning 
and realize the glory of Your gifts 
and how charmingly 
You apply me with strength 
to build faith 
to walk in a place 
where I can add up the known 
and be so empty.  

to add up the unknown, 
the riches of Your glory, 
the riches of Your endowment promised 
to those who don’t see 
but believe – 

I rejoice in the rain of abundance.   

For Your wisdom is such a mystery
it could be in my look upon a rock 
and I hear Your salvation calling me 
to stand upon this Rock 
and build my house.  

Heavenly wisdom 
can be in a ride with a friend 
and from their mouth 
comes tomorrows supply 
I will need when it arrives.  

A call to a parent 
can bring Your financial supply 
as they direct my work 
to include a forgotten support.  

My observations 
whirl around this life created 
to bring You pleasure 
and I discover a new invention

yet it is not a new invention at all, 
but just my own spirit 
connecting to the adoration 
of being one with Father, Son, 
by His Spirit.

only seen and known
in Your mystery.  

As the heart of my total focus 
cherishes the gift of weightlessness, 
I uncover 
the treasure of each interruption; 
or the true insight of each battle, 
the goal to understand and gaze 
upon Love in motion.   

You have placed a space 
for me to track down history, 
detect the outcome of having nothing 
and finding everything 
wanted and needed.  

How to walk in the dark 
and watch light triumph 
as it gains my favor 
and I live to breath 
simply to consume more of its warmth.  

Astounded my sweet Lord, 
for though I am surrounded by tangible, 
I am intrigued 
by intimacy 
of heaven’s kingdom on earth, 
the non-tangible empowering.  

I snuggle up to what faith develops 
as it exposes the true Vine 
to Your domain, 
Your work in me 
that produces absolute and complete satisfaction 
in my being.  

I am astounded my sweet Lord…!

Monday, April 1, 2013

Screaming Frantically Busy

frantically busy, 
circling myself with the same thoughts 
and questioning my priorities; 

physically and mentally unable 
to sort through all this traffic.  


I plead for something
 or somewhere 
to come so that I can rest 
in wisdom’s safe whispers.  

Longing for a song 
that holds a fascinating note 
for such a long time, 
it captures all my attention 
and I stay my ear upon its lift.  

Only to take my eyes off its colorful strength 
to look about me 
that I might share what I hear with another.   

So hungry for this mystery of peace 
that I confidently spend all I've got 
to find it.  

For I heard, 
I heard Word say 
that I follow into the keeping 
of the power of His life 
that guards me from temptations.   

I reach in, 
to the decision 
to lean toward my fight against temptations, 
as my heart surrenders 
to love that harmonizes with each pitch 
of the song it sings over me.   

For I sleep with eyes wide open 
in regret; 
so sweet Jesus I pray Your Prayer, 
I enter not into temptation 
 and plead I be delivered 
from the evil one.  

Identifying with Word’s prayer 
in the garden, 
as He requested His followers 
to not sleep, 
not grow weary, 
not forget the hour is of high importance, 
that I not enter into temptations.  

Lord, keep me; 
keep me and my children 
high above the enemy’s reach 
and safely fixed on You.  

The exuberance of one look, 
catching a sketch 
of a Jesus concept, 
a pattern of walking with Father guidelines
guides me through 
tremendously threatening smoke of my enemy.  

Find me asking Poppa, 
find me praying, 
“lead me not into temptation, 
but deliver me, my children, 
my family and friends
from the evil one…!”

For Jesus' last teaching before being
taken by those Father had set to 
fulfill His death and cross...

"Watch and pray,
lest you enter into temptation."