Uncontrolled Fit Of A Raged One

Tickled by the music in my soul, 

I giddily wander about 

in an expansion of unseen walls 

and yet the security 

love roars its safety. 

Waiting 

while movement 

and electricity of power 

bounces about with me. 

Roads of passion 

direct me 

to find the aches 

desire gives freely, 

as satisfaction pours in 

to take me deeper 

to its consuming dance.  

Opening not only my eyes 

but my heart 

to see with a new thought 

in constant exchange 

for dead-ness 

to life promised for eternal. 

Shaking me 

to appear on the outside 

as an uncontrolled 

fit of a raged one; 

but on the inside - 

the dance 

of Divine's perfect picture, 

surrender.  

Abiding in this Place, 

a Name sent 

as the Kingdom of Heaven 

for my gift, 

Jesus abounds in my heart. 

This Protection 

gives my life 

the uncommon fearless walk 

to know nothing 

can reach in 

and take away such love. 

Listening For The Sound

Listening for the Sound!

For this Sound opens 

more than my mind can keep closed 

by trying to explain. 

Glory has the power 

to embrace us as children 

and raise the windows 

to remove dust, 

and give the heart 

a fresh morning knowledge 

that the whole day is ahead. 

Singling out and taking over 

duties for priorities to surface. 

Oh Sound, 

walk loudly; 

move with power 

as I watch in awe. 

I know only to reach 

with all my senses 

and my heart of desire, 

come and Sound. 

Sound bends 

the steel bars I build, 

melts the armor 

I take on 

as false protection, 

closes the holes 

that the moth has eaten 

in my soul. 

Sound, 

break all barriers 

and shake illness 

from my thinking. 

Soar with the Wind of Passion 

that has only Love 

as its foundation, 

blow through me 

to make my hum 

a song of praise 

higher than ever before. 

Sound, 

my Redeemer, 

make entrance with thunder 

as I then know it is coming. 

Cause my life to know 

this Fire 

that can burn out the sun 

with just a whisper. 

Take a deep breath, 

oh Sound, 

and blow over me. 

Filling me with such praise, 

praise from pure Sound, 

praise that sees One’s Eyes 

that Sound only Love. 

Wait

My Poppa, my Father, my completeness to who I am… You are the Light that I want to focus on at all times.  At all times, when I’m under the rocks for some sort of hiding, or when I’m on that mountain that causes my face to shine; oh, to be awakened by Light and focus upon the brilliance of such power beyond my own ability.  

The call, the warmth, the invitation to just take in the knowledge of You are there…!  Breathing by stopping to recognize the atmosphere of my life in You.  Passion consuming me as if I am a spirit also…Spirit breathing through every portion of my thought then, “more than a body” but a temple of such wonders.  

Fire that has the burn of eternal, not a vapor of soon discarded nothing.  Hunger beyond feeding by earth’s substances. Wrapping me, rushing through me with Wind to abandon stress or issues unsolvable by my own attempt.  Entering into ‘no hurry’ with angelic activity stirring to be a part of His beauty on earth.  

I wait.  I wait.  I wait.  

For now there is no time, only Word and Life causing priorities to line up, filling me with His Holy as I just wait.  I will be different, I will be changed, I will be passion – His Passion as His Name, Jesus stirs and speaks in places of my heart that I hide from.  Places I am not yet ready to see but have a desire to someday.  

Allowing tears to flow as I do not understand what they are even for; just no fear, no condemnation.  I wait, I wait…. Oh to wait in this work beyond understanding.  

Eternal… I love eternal.  It is more than life…it is Jesus and joy like the first time over and over and over as each moment is just that… the First Time forever.  

Waiting.............................................

Broken Into My Life

Poppa, how I see You within my life. Can others see You so clearly in my life? Oh, I do hope so for I feel a real shine going on today. You have broken into my life with such great ideas or suggestions for me to explore, to walk out. Entrance along has been fabulous, and walking about takes my breath away to new levels of breathing. How much more? How can I take in such heavenly kingdom pleasure without exploding with gratitude. I am like a flower enjoying the rain. Knowing this moisture fills me to be Your beauty for all to behold.  Oh, what amazing color You design Your glory.  Filling the earth with Worth, Your Worth.  Causing creation to look up and declare, Jesus - You are....!  

Here, in Your Name, I give surrender to greatness.  To Holy...!  To hear beyond the ability of my minds understanding and look upon the Song that is sung when Jesus walks about. As He moves from doorways to the heart of those He died to give entrance to His Passion, now our Passion also, You Poppa God.  As I let loose of what tries to cause me distractions, and dare enter unknown to find the Hum of Heaven, I marvel at satisfaction. The stop of earth and the Life that changes my destiny, my day that was sliding by to a day that sees the color within it. Increasing love as I forsake the worries and spills of a days journey. For love has cast out all fear.  Knowing love in such extreme has the lift to take me above; reacting to love with confidence it is enough. 

The invitation is set.  Break into my life in constant arrays of diversion that I never fall into boredom. Taking me to love by the revival within that keeps this fire blaring. Removing me from any desire of another god (devoted interest). I am lost in Your love and passion...exactly where I want to stay.  Only moving about by Your Guidance.  

Reckless Changing Love

The faithfulness of One has my heart into change and I yearn for it to never stop.  Changing and being changed to the ready for change!  

Oh, with safety of peace abounding in me, I expand to record my story, changing even my looks as my countenance makes adjustments.  It’s like that body stretch that seems to cause every move from that point on give ease to its once stiff push to stay.  

Pardoning my mess, for I am in construction mode with constant change.  Not to dare disregard my now, for it is His Beauty in me and the tools for my tomorrows.  But I've crossed the line, the line where one goes too far and cannot come back; I have found joy in constant change. 

For I love with passion, graphed in from the depth of reconstruction and upgrade of His likeness, that I begin to love who I am with greater belief.  Not caring what words and thoughts make mention of me, only that I’m lost in this love that feels completely full and yet great expectations for future.  

My soul sings hums and notes that only my thoughts can form understanding; language from the mouth fail to share the race going on inside.  Letting go of endings, hanging on to more; I run with each change. For to look, to receive a moment in this aroma of embrace; its power cannot leave me the same.  See me run; see His Spirit dancing with me as I fearlessly know there is no edge to fall.  For there is no foot upon the ground, only air filling my space, with lift to take me to His Hidden Place, where His Love I am so aware of. 

For love makes one silly with unpredictable exchanges, shuffling everywhere, never alone.  Seldom looking another in the eye, my total gaze has been caught in the tangle of sold out devotion to only what is alive inside, my reckless love to One.  

The faithfulness of One has my heart into change and I yearn for it to never stop.

Companionship (Fellowship of Truth)

Here comes His love 

and it shakes me 

with the giggle of amazement, 

the kind that is so unannounced 

and yet you bounce with joy.  

My thoughts were running 

as if they had no belonging 

and in comes 

the crash of His Pureness.  

I want to touch this with forever; 

I want to inhale 

as I close my eyes 

to bring it in as long as I can.  

I found a place, 

a wonder of heaven 

and it has caught me up 

in its blue sky.  

It has the craziness 

that I want to give 

ownership with abandoned restrictions.  

Light seems to shine so bright 

that there is no other direction to take.  

It’s as if waves are felt 

that go through my whole being 

and I feel every curve, 

every shiver of splash.  

I take note 

of the tiniest of detail 

for it is like the satisfaction love sings.  

A melody 

of companionship (fellowship of truth) 

finds all available open sources of my soul 

and lifts high 

the importance of filling me up to capacity.  

The keys that play my heart 

begin to give this sound 

that wonders around
with the beginning of its song, 

then in comes 

the additional tones of harmony 

with beautiful hums 

and dazzling thought grabbers.  

His whole character 

that is now becoming a visual within 

this conversation 

has ignited the fire that burns from love.  

The flame 

of companionship (fellowship of truth) 

rises in excellent beauty.  

An understanding 

of everything that has breath 

takes on a new meaning.  

For each breath is combined 

to make the music of praise 

as colors are blended 

to make the decoration of His Spirit image.  

Harmony is regarded as perfect light 

with no sounds out of key.  

Companionship ties many to be One. 

Hate

Sitting within the presence of One so pure, I am taken to the truth of hate and its beauty and design for all pain while on earth. Wondering about in this troublesome emotion, I have pondered its continued push to not leave me.  Why be such a companion?  Why pierce my heart with this insistent but gracious pond of memories and acts of foolishness.  Why bother me day and night with begging pleas of attention. 

I run to another thought, thinking maybe, just maybe it will go away.  But I find it dead center in this phrase as well.  Hate is in my life.

I find the mind very confused while the heart seems in perfect peace.  I give stage to the heart as cries come from One so pure that unless I learn to hate what One hates and love what One loves, I am stranded in the breaking process of failure.  

It is difficult to look at others and find hate as a safety, but encouraged to continue, I proceed. 

Eternity speaks and now I’m seeing not just today but the tomorrow of my soul.  Hate must be addressed so it can find its destiny.  The war must be called to attention so change of the fairest delight can make entrance.  

So I dare look it in the eye.  Ugly, vaporous stink more than substance.  Its sticky blackness is smeared in unbelievable places.  Places I would not have dreamed it could take form. Walking about on me, and other non-suspicious minds all around me, with its slow crawl to invade and cover.  

How terribly embarrassed to be such a welcome vessel to house such sneaky intruders!  Screaming for the awakened hearts everywhere to see the invasion, I am shut down and thrown into a corner, guarded by words swearing I will not have leave.

But as my heart is held in this awareness, I notice the wide open world of song about me; as if I see, but the warriors of another army came to blind my enemy from seeing me.  Now bound to truth of love and hate, Beauty comes and chooses me as decor for projects I've yet to discover, while swiftly guiding me to stand as display for perfect announcements. 

Waiting; I find waiting in this amazing room my new favorite meal.  My indescribable breath-taking movie theater of adventure, I’m frozen to watch activity One is doing.  

I’m curious to wonder if I would ever want to leave and yet it appeared I was thrown in to die. 

Hate, when held to be the salvation Love is doing, separates you to Heaven from the hell you live in at times. 

Safety In Speed

Catching the Wind is impossible, 

or is it?  

Like a sailboat upon the waters, 

with its sail set high 

and moved by the power 

of this unseen 

but wonder of mystic substance; 

I climb 

and speed race often.  

Making the decision 

to be listening for its sound, 

patience to wait with want 

built extreme with desires, 

I open my sail (heart) 

for the exposure 

to be carried by its passing.  

For the adventure 

is the refuge of a weary soul, 

the abundance of trust is mine 

that I previously looked for 

in the ground which does not move.  

Questions come 

with answers packed in songs 

rather than holes left 

by swords of accusations 

from missed marks of attack. 

Now in the safety of speed, 

I am where I am going - 

not trying to get there!   

Oh Wind, 

spread your force about me 

and whisk my feet 

from ground that crumbles 

and take me 

to the safety 

of Spirit’s tornadoes.

Steps Love Exhibits

The emotions that break forth into steps love exhibits, has me walking into a realm more real than fears that kept me out in the past. Finding His eyes as assurance, I am held with such passion He was motivated to create me with. For if I ponder the scary reasons I might have been formed, I either come up empty or have wide thoughts of  how things might 'just happened.'  But breaking forth into steps love exhibits, I find the phrase, least you become as a child you will not see the Kingdom of God, and I am swallowed in the passion of being His child.  Nothing more, just finding my world (mighty self talk) shrinking, and His Kingdom becoming visible with sounds of love inside and out of my being. Its as if my body begins to sing and I love the music it dances to. Now the world around speaks such a different message and it amazes me. Finding no cares, only the joy of exploring full access of what was made, including myself as the wonders of His Voice of power in the tiny of weakness.  Taking in the sight of a mustard seed so small and yet the power of its story so mighty. The call from my heart to send my love, so small, and watch it become the roar of the thunder around His throne. To be heard as gathered aroma, released to make known my existence, His delightful creation made for His joy.

His love qualifies us to be mighty.  Our call... just become as a child (know Him as Father).

I Cry To Die

That moment before 

the flesh completely surrenders... 

the wondering, 

the roads of many decisions 

are before me. 

Traveling at extreme, 

faster than noted from man; 

consuming me 

is the wake of Spirit 

calling with loud pulls 

beyond voice, 

to my instinct 

created to be 

at the ultimate contentment. 

Pulled into heaven come down, 

I wobble 

with continued decisions 

to die to self.  

For if I do not die, 

I remain 

in my own unstable mind. 

I weep with silliness 

for I am faltering 

and yet I can feel strength 

making its entrance 

with mighty arms.  

I hear faintly 

for my hearing is still so dull, 

I only know 

I am curiously (but weak) 

wanting this Place.  

His Name comes in 

like the wind of a whisper 

and I begin to focus.  

I feel it is speaking 

but I still cannot hear. 

Oh that I could hear; 

and just that quickly, 

I hear the Name.  

Jesus, 

His Name sings 

with power, 

as I accept its realm 

as my own.  

Suddenly I hear doors locking.  

I feel the extreme of safety 

and I know 

I have entered a Place 

in the middle of my night. 

All within me now sleeps, 

the flesh has be conquered. 

A peculiar float begins 

as I look around 

to rejoice of His work 

to bring me here. 

I find more complication 

in finding words 

to honor this place.  

I must listen 

my soul cries; 

and in my quiet 

I see His Eyes upon me.  

His eyes speak such love 

that I am overwhelmed. 

His stare seems to give 

loudly a promise 

I reluctantly have accepted. 

The promise is 

that His eyes have been 

and always will be 

as I see them now, 

consumed with me.  

For moments I look away. 

I do not know why 

but it seems difficult 

for faith to rise 

that this really is. 

I take notice 

that I am barely touching 

into what is really there.  

I have only tapped 

into what is so abundant. 

I fall away, 

my hunger within my body 

screams.  

I call back, NO...!  

I cannot leave.  

I am instantly 

in knowledge 

of His Eyes upon me, 

again.  

I smile 

as I realize every encounter 

is forever charted 

and never returns 

to Him void.  

My desire to die 

is heard 

and a legion of angels 

await to watch 

the beauty of His life form.

It's Here My Soul Sings

It’s here, my soul sings; 

His Kingdom 

\0/

Running so swiftly to call me 

do not look back, 

do not go for a thing… 

just go! 

Do not stop 

for a single distraction, 

but look at the call 

and be filled with its wonders.  

If I am speechless, 

do not be consumed with concern.  

For the One who reigns 

has dominance 

and the heart will melt 

before Him.  

The end has not color, 

only the Voice that speaks 

without fade 

becomes visible.  

Circling the earth 

as its pull creates new breath, 

new atmosphere.  

Feeling the weightlessness 

is not noticed 

for belonging to this life 

is so immortal, 

this gift is as if it’s always been.   

Eyes are now set 

for its total purpose, 

to behold Beauty.  

Praise is not limited 

to my voice that is frail 

and weak in understanding, 

but the essence of being His child 

gives elaborate décor 

and tones of pitch 

that bounce 

from star to star 

to rage of His Kingdom.  

The move of un-chartable time 

is without repeat, 

like the fingerprint 

of His created child 

un-numbered.  

His Kingdom 

feels like slow-motion steps 

but it is due to 

the unseen is much thicker, 

substance of great consistency, 

when flesh follows to make explanations.   

Let Your Kingdom come, 

my soul sings with great plea.  

Let Your Kingdom 

be on earth as it is in Heaven….! 

Change my mind 

by each delight 

my Father gives.  

Take me to where 

I am the depth of His every move 

and yet I am so consumed 

I can only know He is God. 

Together, moving 

as His Beauty reaches me 

for more revelation.

It’s here, my soul sings; 

His Kingdom...!

Ready To Be Squeezed

When a wind comes through, 

I look up 

as if I will see 

from where it came from. 

Silly me!  

You can’t see the wind, 

only watch what it touches.  

Oh Poppa, 

when Your Spirit breezes through, 

I marvel at watching 

what it does to me, 

how it touches me.  

What tunes, 

what notes sound 

as this Sweet Wind blows about, 

to cause music 

to come forth from me 

like I was created to be.  

Playing me 

like I was of 

Your most prized instrument.  

My thoughts explore 

the whole experience 

with force to gather 

this harvest of emotions 

like a dry sponge 

absorbs every drop of moisture 

it can hold.  

Ready to be squeezed 

here and there 

so what I gathered 

can be enjoyed 

all about my travels.   

Waiting, watching, 

holding on as long as I can; 

often freezing in a stand-still 

so all remains within. 

Swinging back 

to its beginning 

so a rehearsal can pick up 

any that might have been missed 

the first time.  

Not one swish of this Wind 

has no meaning.  

As I stay in these hurricanes 

or slight touch 

of hearing the Wind, 

I hum my life to You 

as the melody 

of this memorable moment.  

For I listen 

to the high and low 

of such power 

and with surrendering of my will, 

I see my life 

as Your song.  

The sweet rest 

that calms my weary soul 

gives understanding 

the song is singing 

with victory of love about me. 

New appetites 

beyond my previous knowledge 

are now both developing 

and being satisfied.  

With the pitch Your Spirit 

created among Your beloved, 

I lift my own 

to blend in harmony 

the New Song that is awakened.

Standing In The Flame

The gap gets wide, 

the one between flesh 

and surrendered heart, 

at times. 

The heart keeps exploding 

with desires 

and such contentment. 

Standing in the flame 

that has me captivated with trust, 

I am in divine safety.  

Created to dwell 

within this mystic place 

so set on courting me 

to the fascinating pleasures, 

Holy wins.  

Running, 

I can feel my heart beat, 

as the speed to be there 

is magnified tremendously.  

I find the gate, 

I run inside and I dance 

with everything I've got 

for I’m only moments away 

from it going away 

like the taste of delicious 

won’t stay.  

Untamed fire, 

burning all around, 

yet I cannot predict the Wind.  

But that I may live 

in this guided run, 

this place where the song 

that moves my steps 

are not chased 

but consumed 

as I am carried by this Wind.  

Taken higher and higher 

in the single praise 

of Holy, Holy, Holy.  

As each voiced ‘Holy’ 

gives distinct fragrance 

as explanation showers 

among His beloved ones.   

As we inhale, 

may we exhale 

what it takes 

to spread the Fire of wonders 

this sweet Spirit.

Pleasures of Flawless Word

Thirsty and yet swimming in an ocean of the only One true drink that refreshes.  Oh how I love His dwelling.  For though I wonder about to find a cup, I have only to realize the open abundance and simply open my mouth (thoughts) to receive divine substance.  How often I have heard the plea from another for what they already hold but do not reach for its lavishness; and yet this is a perfect example of what I myself whimper. Directions are lost in the shuffle to exist by the knowledge of smooth words that create a sense of walls, so safety is in the counsel of our own declaration built of sand - not rock.  

Break in, Spirit that guides to the inheritance of what I already have. Take me to be filled and drink from the power of seeing the Face of such glory of exquisite Light.  The pleasures of flawless Word exploding moment by moment to interrupt the song sung over me, the sounds of heaven come down.  My gaze I lift, to have eyes to describe the fragrance of such refreshing. 

Paint before me for my choice is set on You, Your heart that gives all a new song to sing.  Worship pushed to my Choice, Jesus, who has taken me as rags I am to the riches of who He is.  A new song built from any word or words You would like but the newness of its changing color it creates in me.  Taking a flower to its fullest bloom, but the revival of each step has beauty that gives a picture of everlasting beauty.  Shine upon me that I bloom in beauty, Your beauty that sounds to the ends of heaven and earth.

Pour the favor You have towards us, to me and my children and children’s children.  Pleasures given from the design You have made so plentiful.  Pleasures Your love has taken to awaken what has been created, to enjoy from the revealing of Your sweetness this Wisdom of such a revelation.  Let us behold the detail as well as the finished portrait of Grace and Mercy's work on earth.  

The pleasure of flawless Word be my Rock...!

Dreams Unfolding

This day has the image of His righteousness within its boarders, His love that was powerfully saving and arranging for my eyes to behold. It is time for dreams to be unfolded as His love flows like a fire larger than any dampness can put out.  Raging from one hand to another, one heart to another, one life to another, as we speak, sing and dance the awakened love it has brought.

How I hear the sounds, this mighty emotion that has burned its Name within my life.  Taking His Son to be the revival, resting in my soul.  How it overpowers things I no longer remember was my highest idol.  How this love smothers the signs I took wrong directions from.  Placing One focus, One ending as I build this altar to bring my all. Surrendering, daring to come and accept so that I find all that I've wanted.

My Deceitful Heart

How do we offer praise with such a word as, “Holy"?  

From my experience it is by knowing, with personal examples, how far we have missed the mark.  From our cry of defeat, we better understand what we are saying when we sing unto the Lord as we call Him, "Holy."  

Think of this... what would you be saying if you called someone ‘cute’ without giving thought to how you have packaged such a statement; how you stacked up examples or took into account from some source to give this word great worth and meaning.  How many times, guilty as charged, are we of speaking with little thought to what we are declaring.  But to take into account all your judgments and past experience, declaring one cute gives a level of worth, from your standards, when spoken.  With God, who is Holy, and of such that angels do not stop declaring this level of worth 24/7, we come to join the worship; and if I bring Him 'me' and not someone else, I can release from my heart a great or small praise according to my own life shown me. 

Let me give an example from my own experience.  Today I was given a call from a scam artist.  It is in my job description to handle these calls as all businesses receive those who want to get into the budget, whether we want or not.  He is most pleasant on the phone as anyone; giving me information he wants me to believe important and greatly helpful.  I knew, almost immediately, he was not looking to my good but entirely to his own, for deception came from his first statements.  Telling me a price change is in effect to something we do not even purchase, from a company we have contract with but do not buy supplies from.  His attempts to be helpful yet deceitful, was met just as quickly by my own deceitful heart to try to trip him up and reveal something that I could hold against him; corner him into a tumbling crash over his evil heart.  Kindness was flying back and forth between us like we sincerely wished the other the riches of the day.  Until he crashed, raising his voice, saying a word inappropriate to any business call and slamming his phone down.  I sit in shock.  It was a new scam, new boldness; and I fell right into its battle as I gave in to my anger, kindle by my own righteous verdict for 'I knew this was a scam...!'  He must be exposed and see I know...! 

I repented right then and asked God, “How could I have reached him instead of such a crash for us both?”  I felt so defeated.  I had no information I could use against him nor had I attempted any sort of effort to lead him to a correction as the sweet Holy Spirit does me.  This is when I was gently guided to see how I had warred deceit against deceit and in the eyes of a loving Father, we just drank one another’s vomit. 

How does this apply to giving God praise by declaring Him Holy?

By my repenting heart God’s kindness gave me, I was led to the understanding I have repeatedly been engaged in many times  …. on the same side as my defender.  Even greater do I realize my own inability to save myself but to come daily to His grace, moment by moment, choosing to accept His love and be moved by His Holiness and not my own.  His unfailing kindness, pure heart, and motive for my life to be abundant, not wanting me to be taken by my own deceit, nor another's deception, He shows me holiness.  A step deeper, having knowledge, as I place this praise before Him, "You are Holy."

To understand He is the ONLY ONE Holy is to get that we are not.  And yet, He dwells within and we are led to holiness as we see what it truly is and become the same through Him.  What a fascinating God.

I Danced With Angels

Before you mark me as crazy, let me just share.  This is a personal but amazing moment of love I often ponder.

Sometimes I just love to reflect on experiences that I can't explain but that I love what life it brought me. One of these moments happened several years back when I was so caught up in a moment with my God and praise that I felt I was dancing with angels.  It was a moment of bright beautiful color as the angels held ribbons, soft ribbon that circled about me.  We danced and giggled as ever so often I was dipped low, twirling with such a dance, and as I would touch upon earth, I would grab another person to dance with us. On and on the ribbons were gathered around me as I saw no reason to understand, just to worship and play in the midst of such a jubilee over Jesus.  I should find this and reread my noting such a time but I remember well the excitement and wonderment once it was a memory rather than an event happening.

Was I really dancing with angels?  Was I really not on earth but high upon the heavens?  Was I dreaming during the day?  I don't know, not really, but I WAS caught up in worship.  As I rehearse again the moment, here is what it felt like...!

  

Dancing with angels was like connecting to an emotion over a fact indisputable.  Having in common the focus of such excitement; out came the party, the life that everyone wants to know and attend.  The single song has color and sound but there is only the one purpose for such elaborate decor.  The moment seals its own reality, for you see with eyes of eternity and not the arrogance of announcing other keepsakes.  Lost in the eternity of the moment; it has the now, yesterday and forever - no beginning, no end, sounding its work. The lead is the heart and all are following its gleefulness.  Each is in connection with a plan unfolding and there are no thoughts of one out of step.  Beautifully, the heart does not allow the mind to explain, only to come along and learn. Surrender to kindness, there is only amazement of love, and all moves have this deepness as its choreographer. Lost in what you dance for...One who created you and adores you.

Dance is a catching up of His Story. 

More Than Now and Even More Than Eternal

Oh Poppa, fix my eyes upon You and may I find extreme uncomfortable nudges when I lose sight of Your Face.  

I call out to You for I know I am one with many words, many thoughts, and many emotions.  Dwell within my heart with full openness on my part, and be my obsession at all times.  Prosper my soul so I can keep to my vow to be Yours.  

Let my vision be of constant desire and it lead me to the waters of Your fountain.  Take me to the Presence of Holiness and allow me to touch this with gratefulness as I am overwhelmed by its fire.  

I view before me the making of eternal and may I not be arrogant to the now.  Oh but Your touch, Your fullness of conversation speaking into my life day and night with Your extravagance. 

More than now and even more than eternal, 

Your love dwelling within to form the change 

of my rags to riches as who You are takes its form in me 

and makes me amazing like You.  

Fitting me with this garment of praise that signs me up for the time of my life eternally; with eternity unclear and unknown but secure in my being of utmost content wrapped in zeal.  

My very feelings, my senses of all that takes me forward, be playing as a harp that causes the listener to instantly be brought to Your face.  Let us become lost to earth but weightless with heaven’s kingdom.  

Rage within me; this unending crave for Your love that will never go away.  Release what is taking my thoughts and speaking this honeymoon power of love that has invaded my life.  

Never let me talk myself out of trying to calm the fire.  Fan me with the wind that blows this fire uncontrollably to all nations.  Connecting hearts and songs that speak this zeal and completes this dream with purity of our cry; singing within us to guide this walk of love.  

More than now and even more than eternal, 

Your love dwelling within to form the change 

of my rags to riches as who You are takes its form in me 

and makes me amazing like You.  

His Call Pulls My Thoughts

He CALLS for me.  

His love pulls my thoughts,

singing with depth that reaches

all levels.

He seeks out my heart.  

He looks my way 

and calls me out.  

Saying my name, 

calling with a draw 

that pulls like a whirlwind 

against many walls 

made from my stony heart.  

Giving me a revelation 

that this wind is His power 

and it is without stop 

to take me to His arms 

where safety is the wonders 

of my day and night.  

While storms arise, 

I rest in a place 

where the enemy’s unobtainable break-in 

to His kingdom, 

I live.  

Lavished with His song 

filling the air I breathe 

as I inhale love 

from His throne of infinity.  

Can I declare such 

that fills the heart?  

Can I explain 

where all the movement 

of sensations travel 

as love gives exchange?

My return of His love...

to hear His call 

and share.

Guilty Of Wanting Others To Be God To Me

Thoughts:

I am broken this morning.  Broken with thoughts that I want to face and not hide.  Places where correction is my only hope.  I am so guilty of wanting others to be ‘God’ to me.  By that I mean I have searched to be loved and even went into denial when it was not there to prove to myself they love me like God loves me.  I was so ignorant and silly to do so.  I was walking in darkness, looking for God and all His promises to be filled but I looked to find it in others as much or more than I looked to find it within, where He is and lives.  

Without knowing or having a spiritual understanding, I felt my worth dissolving time and time again by my actions, their actions, my falling, their failing, my right standing, their right standing, my successes, their successes and YES, my failure and their failures.  I am ‘worth’ or have ‘love’ according to others on earth.  

Oh my my my…! So opposite of His amazing love.  I am learning His love, finding it MUST start by knowing His Love exist and that I was made for that to be poured upon. NOT to understand but know it by allowing this bazaar truth work in me.  We are His Passion and His great work.  He sat back on the seventh day and said “IT IS GOOD.”  When God repented of making mankind, I do not understand it but that statement is all about HIM…. NOT ME..!!!!!  He declared something I don’t understand about HIS WORK…!  Wow…!  

But He went another direction, I somehow believe so that in and by eternity we will be forever knowing His love BY HIS WORK IN US.  For He loves His work and thought of me before He went to action to separate the dark from the light or water from land… on and on.  Designing his role and the plan to bring ALL things into order as He continues to oversee His eternity.  Without understanding I say in folly as a child, I am loved in extreme for this a child believes and cries from the beginning to be loved.  He created that and said… ‘Don’t lose that..!  unless you remain as a child, you’ll not see my kingdom’  My thoughts….I will walk in His love and discipline but I will never know it unless I’m a child. I will slip right through my life without knowing I am so loved He sent His Son to insure my place with Trinity, unless I remain as His child.  

To see His kingdom is to live like a child under the magnificent Poppa of Three.  Saying and being ugly at times and I cry and weep I’m sorry.  Get up and find forgiveness by God, not always by others… this I must just show and give what I’ve received.  To be silly and adventurous at times, going too far until I am cautioned back.  On and on the ways of a child knowing they have a momma and daddy that loves, spanks from love, guides by love..etc etc… to be named after Their Name and live in that kingdom (Place – His Name).

Oh my, I easily see others as His pride and joy for I am the same.  When I discover that my worth is beyond my own debt to pay, I MUST live with that.  I can’t pay it.  Ouch.  But this is what He set as His creation and even warned me to know that He set governments upon nations… this is HIS creation.  I love the story in Daniel 3, I believe (I need to look it up) opps, it’s Daniel 5… MSG BIBLE

^18-21 “Listen, O king! The High God gave your father Nebuchadnezzar a great kingdom and a glorious reputation. Because God made him so famous, people from everywhere, whatever their race, color, and creed, were totally intimidated by him. He killed or spared people on whim. He promoted or humiliated people capriciously. He developed a big head and a hard spirit. Then God knocked him off his high horse and stripped him of his fame. He was thrown out of human company, lost his mind, and lived like a wild animal. He ate grass like an ox and was soaked by heaven’s dew until he learned his lesson: that the High God rules human kingdoms and puts anyone he wants in charge.

^22-23 “You are his son and have known all this, yet you’re as arrogant as he ever was. Look at you, setting yourself up in competition against the Master of heaven! You had the sacred chalices from his Temple brought into your drunken party so that you and your nobles, your wives and your concubines, could drink from them. You used the sacred chalices to toast your gods of silver and gold, bronze and iron, wood and stone—blind, deaf, and imbecile gods. But you treat with contempt the living God who holds your entire life from birth to death in his hand.

Wow, God is so good..!!!!  until he learned his lesson. I am His and treasured by His love in such desperate ways, I cannot comprehend.  He holds my life and I want to never take my life back again to find ‘I’ am something of my own.  No, I am His work and His affection is mine to enjoy.  Trusting His work, leaning to His answer for all things…!  

I believe this is my ‘lesson’ right now…. Don’t desire others to be God to you…. The God is the only God.  He loves unconditionally and is working His work in His creation. Do not measure yourself among yourselves, do not judge nor set sentences upon His work (Spirit’s love).  No one, me included, can be God – we are His subject of affection and He loves His work.   

Sure sometimes I wish I were the hand rather than the butt… :0) but I repent and say… to You Poppa, I give my butt…!!!!  And He loves me as a butt…!!!

Thoughts.... fascinating!